1
00:01:46,680 --> 00:01:48,719
Eating as usual I see, Algy!

2
00:01:49,239 --> 00:01:50,959
I believe it is usual in good society

3
00:01:51,159 --> 00:01:53,599
to take some slight refreshment|after morning exercise.

4
00:01:55,079 --> 00:01:56,799
And what bring you to London, my dear Ernest?

5
00:01:56,959 --> 00:02:00,159
Oh, pleasure, pleasure! What else|should bring one anywhere?

6
00:02:00,640 --> 00:02:02,359
Where have you been since last Thursday?

7
00:02:02,719 --> 00:02:03,920
In the country.

8
00:02:04,079 --> 00:02:05,560
What on earth do you do there?

9
00:02:06,519 --> 00:02:10,400
When one is in town one amuses oneself. When|one is in the country one amuses other people.

10
00:02:10,599 --> 00:02:12,159
And who are the people you amuse?

11
00:02:12,960 --> 00:02:14,439
Oh, neighbours, neighbours.

12
00:02:14,759 --> 00:02:17,120
Got nice neighbours in your part of Shropshire?

13
00:02:17,599 --> 00:02:19,479
Perfectly horrid! Never speak to one of them.

14
00:02:20,439 --> 00:02:22,159
How immensely you must amuse them!

15
00:02:22,960 --> 00:02:24,680
Shropshire is your county, is it not?

16
00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:26,719
Shropshire? Yes, of course.

17
00:02:28,199 --> 00:02:30,800
By the way, Gwendolen is in town, isn't she?

18
00:02:30,960 --> 00:02:32,159
She is.

19
00:02:32,639 --> 00:02:33,919
In fact she's having tea with me this afternoon.

20
00:02:35,159 --> 00:02:36,639
How perfectly delightful.

21
00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:38,680
And so is Aunt Augusta.

22
00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:45,000
You know, the way you flirt with Gwendolen

23
00:02:45,159 --> 00:02:47,439
is almost as bad as the way|Gwendolen flirts with you.

24
00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:49,919
I am in love with Gwendolen.

25
00:02:50,319 --> 00:02:52,759
I have come up to town|expressly to propose to her.

26
00:02:53,280 --> 00:02:54,680
I thought you had come up for pleasure?

27
00:02:54,879 --> 00:02:56,080
I call that business.

28
00:02:56,439 --> 00:02:58,240
How utterly unromantic you are!

29
00:02:58,879 --> 00:03:00,919
I really don't see anything|romantic in proposing.

30
00:03:01,439 --> 00:03:04,879
It is very romantic to be in love. But there is|nothing romantic about a definite proposal.

31
00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:06,960
Why, one may be accepted.

32
00:03:07,199 --> 00:03:09,919
One usually is, I believe.|Then the excitement is all over.

33
00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:12,199
The very essence of romance is uncertainty.

34
00:03:12,960 --> 00:03:15,520
If ever I get married, I'll certainly|try to forget the fact.

35
00:03:16,400 --> 00:03:20,599
I have no doubt about that, dear Algy. The Divorce|Court was specially invented for people like you.

36
00:03:22,199 --> 00:03:25,039
Divorces are made in Heaven. Marriages are...

37
00:03:26,439 --> 00:03:27,919
Yes, Algy?

38
00:03:29,360 --> 00:03:31,639
Oh, well, there's no use speculating|on this subject.

39
00:03:32,520 --> 00:03:35,080
Or indeed your speculating on marrying Gwendolen.

40
00:03:35,919 --> 00:03:37,400
Why on Earth you say that?

41
00:03:37,599 --> 00:03:40,120
Well, in the first place girls never|marry the men they flirt with.

42
00:03:40,400 --> 00:03:42,759
- Oh, that is nonsense!|- It isn't. It is a great truth.

43
00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:46,599
It accounts for the extraordinary number|of bachelors that one sees all over the place.

44
00:03:47,199 --> 00:03:49,159
In the second place, I don't give my consent.

45
00:03:49,319 --> 00:03:50,520
Your consent!

46
00:03:52,039 --> 00:03:54,319
My dear fellow, Gwendolen is my first cousin.

47
00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:58,479
And before I allow you to marry her, you will|have to clear up the whole question of Cecily.

48
00:03:59,919 --> 00:04:02,719
Cecily? What on earth do you mean?

49
00:04:03,360 --> 00:04:07,240
What do you mean, Algy, by Cecily!|I don't know any one of the name of Cecily.

50
00:04:08,360 --> 00:04:11,080
Do you mean to say you have had|my cigarette case all this time?

51
00:04:11,479 --> 00:04:14,759
I wish to goodness you'd let me know. I've been|writing frantic letters to Scotland Yard about it.

52
00:04:14,919 --> 00:04:16,639
I was very nearly offering a large reward.

53
00:04:16,839 --> 00:04:19,879
Well, I wish you would offer one.|I happen to be more than usually hard up.

54
00:04:20,079 --> 00:04:22,639
There is no good offering a large reward|now that the thing is found.

55
00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:25,240
I think that is rather mean of you,|Ernest, I must say.

56
00:04:25,959 --> 00:04:27,600
However, it makes no matter,

57
00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:29,680
for, now that I look at the inscription,

58
00:04:29,879 --> 00:04:31,839
I find that the thing isn't yours after all.

59
00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:34,639
But of course it's mine. You have seen me|with it a hundred times.

60
00:04:34,959 --> 00:04:37,319
You have no right whatsoever|to read what is written inside.

61
00:04:37,600 --> 00:04:40,480
It is a very ungentlemanly thing|to read a private cigarette case.

62
00:04:40,680 --> 00:04:44,120
Oh! It's absurd to have a hard and fast rule about|what one should read and what one shouldn't read.

63
00:04:44,279 --> 00:04:46,639
More than half of modern culture|depends on what one shouldn't read.

64
00:04:46,839 --> 00:04:49,560
I am quite aware of the fact, and I don't propose|to discuss modern culture with you.

65
00:04:49,759 --> 00:04:52,720
It isn't the sort of thing one should talk of in|private. I simply want my cigarette case back.

66
00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:56,519
Yes; but this isn't your cigarette case.

67
00:04:56,839 --> 00:04:59,720
This cigarette case is a present from|some one of the name of Cecily,

68
00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:02,000
and you said you didn't know any one|of that name.

69
00:05:02,920 --> 00:05:05,040
Well, if you want to know,

70
00:05:06,079 --> 00:05:08,120
Cecily happens to be my aunt.

71
00:05:11,720 --> 00:05:13,240
- Your aunt!|- Yes.

72
00:05:13,439 --> 00:05:16,240
Charming old lady she is, too.|Lives at Tunbridge Wells.

73
00:05:18,040 --> 00:05:19,519
But why does she call herself little Cecily

74
00:05:19,680 --> 00:05:21,319
if she is your aunt

75
00:05:21,519 --> 00:05:22,879
and lives at Tunbridge Wells?

76
00:05:23,399 --> 00:05:26,040
'From little Cecily with her fondest love.'

77
00:05:26,199 --> 00:05:29,240
My dear fellow, what on earth is there in that?

78
00:05:29,839 --> 00:05:31,800
Some aunts are tall, some aunts are not tall.

79
00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:35,160
That is a matter that surely an aunt|may be allowed to decide for herself.

80
00:05:35,319 --> 00:05:37,040
For Heaven's sake give me back my cigarette case.

81
00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:40,120
Yes. But why does your aunt call you her uncle?

82
00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:43,920
'From little Cecily, with her fondest love|to her dear Uncle Jack.'

83
00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:47,319
There is no objection, I admit,|to an aunt being a small aunt,

84
00:05:47,560 --> 00:05:51,519
but why an aunt, no matter what her size may be,|should call her own nephew her uncle,

85
00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:53,120
I can't quite make out.

86
00:05:53,279 --> 00:05:55,920
Besides, your name isn't Jack at all;|it is Ernest.

87
00:05:56,199 --> 00:05:57,680
It isn't Ernest; it's Jack.

88
00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:01,319
You have always told me it was Ernest.

89
00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:04,240
You are the most Ernest-looking|person I ever saw in my life.

90
00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:06,439
It is perfectly absurd your saying that|your name isn't Ernest.

91
00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:08,079
It's on your cards. Here is one of them.

92
00:06:08,240 --> 00:06:10,759
'Mr. Ernest Worthing, B. 4, The Albany.'

93
00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:13,959
I shall keep this as a proof that your name|is Ernest if ever you attempt to deny

94
00:06:14,079 --> 00:06:16,360
the fact to me, or to Gwendolen,|or to any one else.

95
00:06:16,519 --> 00:06:20,040
Well, my name is Ernest in town|and Jack in the country,

96
00:06:20,199 --> 00:06:21,839
and the cigarette case was given|to me in the country.

97
00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:25,399
But that doesn't account for the fact that your|small Aunt Cecily, who lives at Tunbridge Wells,

98
00:06:25,560 --> 00:06:27,360
calls you her dear uncle.

99
00:06:27,519 --> 00:06:29,720
Come, old boy, you had much better|have the thing out at once.

100
00:06:29,959 --> 00:06:32,319
My dear Algy, you talk exactly|like a dentist.

101
00:06:33,079 --> 00:06:35,720
I may mention that I have always suspected

102
00:06:36,680 --> 00:06:41,439
and now I am quite sure, that you are a|confirmed and secret Bunburyist;

103
00:06:41,639 --> 00:06:43,839
Bunburyist?

104
00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:47,079
What on earth do you mean by a Bunburyist?

105
00:06:48,279 --> 00:06:51,079
I'll reveal to you the meaning of that|incomparable expression

106
00:06:51,480 --> 00:06:55,439
when you are kind enough to tell me why you|are Ernest in town and Jack in the country.

107
00:06:57,360 --> 00:06:59,240
Well, produce my cigarette case first.

108
00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:00,600
Here it is.

109
00:07:01,560 --> 00:07:03,199
Now produce your explanation,

110
00:07:03,759 --> 00:07:06,040
and pray make it improbable.

111
00:07:06,319 --> 00:07:08,600
There is nothing improbable|about my explanation at all.

112
00:07:09,199 --> 00:07:13,399
Old Mr. Thomas Cardew, who adopted me when|I was a little boy, made me in his will

113
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:16,639
guardian to his grand-daughter,|Miss Cecily Cardew.

114
00:07:17,360 --> 00:07:19,480
Cecily, who addresses me as her uncle

115
00:07:19,680 --> 00:07:22,720
from motives of respect that you could|not possibly appreciate,

116
00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:26,040
lives at my place in the country under|the charge of her admirable governess,

117
00:07:26,199 --> 00:07:27,560
Miss Prism.

118
00:07:27,920 --> 00:07:29,959
Where in that place in the country, by the way?

119
00:07:30,839 --> 00:07:33,879
That is nothing to you, dear boy. You are|not going to be invited.

120
00:07:34,639 --> 00:07:37,360
I may tell you candidly that it|is not in Shropshire.

121
00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:39,240
I suspected that!

122
00:07:39,439 --> 00:07:43,199
I have Bunburyed all over Shropshire on|two separate occasions. Now, go on.

123
00:07:44,439 --> 00:07:47,160
When one is placed in the position|of guardian, one has to adopt

124
00:07:47,319 --> 00:07:50,279
a very high moral tone on all subjects.

125
00:07:50,800 --> 00:07:52,519
It's one's duty to do so.

126
00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:56,240
And as a high moral tone can hardly be|said to conduce very much

127
00:07:56,439 --> 00:07:58,560
to either one's health or one's happiness,

128
00:07:58,720 --> 00:08:01,680
in order to get up to town I have always|pretended to have a younger brother

129
00:08:01,839 --> 00:08:04,120
of the name of Ernest, who lives|here in the Albany,

130
00:08:04,279 --> 00:08:06,319
and gets into the most dreadful scrapes.

131
00:08:07,079 --> 00:08:09,279
- That, my dear Algy, is the whole truth.|- Oh, no.

132
00:08:10,079 --> 00:08:12,360
What you really are is a Bunburyist.

133
00:08:12,759 --> 00:08:14,720
I was perfectly right in saying|you were a Bunburyist.

134
00:08:14,879 --> 00:08:17,319
You are one of the most advanced|Bunburyists I know.

135
00:08:17,480 --> 00:08:18,879
What on earth do you mean?

136
00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:21,920
You have invented a very useful|younger brother called Ernest,

137
00:08:22,120 --> 00:08:24,480
in order that you may be able to come|up to London as often as you like.

138
00:08:24,759 --> 00:08:26,560
I have invented an invaluable

139
00:08:26,759 --> 00:08:28,879
permanent invalid called Bunbury,

140
00:08:29,279 --> 00:08:32,159
in order that I may be able to go down|into the country whenever I choose.

141
00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:35,799
Bunbury really is invaluable. If it wasn't|for Bunbury's

142
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,639
extraordinary bad health,|for instance,

143
00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:40,039
I wouldn't be able to dine with you|at Willis's tonight,

144
00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:43,159
for I have been really engaged to dine at|Aunt Augusta's for more than a week.

145
00:08:43,639 --> 00:08:45,360
I haven't asked you to dine with me|anywhere tonight.

146
00:08:46,519 --> 00:08:49,240
I know. You are absurdly careless|about sending out invitations.

147
00:08:49,879 --> 00:08:53,399
It is very foolish of you. Nothing annoys people|more than not receiving invitations.

148
00:08:54,679 --> 00:08:55,720
Algy, eh...

149
00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:05,559
Seton!

150
00:09:08,480 --> 00:09:09,759
Sir?

151
00:09:09,919 --> 00:09:13,120
Seton I shall require a fresh gardenia|this afternoon.

152
00:09:13,279 --> 00:09:14,919
At four o'clock precisely.

153
00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:16,320
Very well, sir.

154
00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:33,720
Ethel, come here!

155
00:09:40,559 --> 00:09:41,679
Thank you, sir.

156
00:09:42,919 --> 00:09:44,200
Giddap!

157
00:09:57,679 --> 00:09:59,399
Did you hear what I was singing, Lane?

158
00:09:59,720 --> 00:10:01,519
I didn't think it polite to listen, sir.

159
00:10:01,759 --> 00:10:03,480
I'm sorry for that, for your sake.

160
00:10:03,639 --> 00:10:05,759
I don't sing in tune, anybody can sing in tune.

161
00:10:06,279 --> 00:10:07,919
But I sing with wonderful feeling.

162
00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:09,120
Yes, sir.

163
00:10:09,600 --> 00:10:11,559
You have got the cucumber sandwiches|for Lady Bracknell?

164
00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:12,679
Yes, sir.

165
00:10:17,879 --> 00:10:19,000
Excuse me, sir.

166
00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:25,559
Have Lady Bracknell and Miss Fairfax arrived yet?

167
00:10:25,759 --> 00:10:26,799
No, sir.

168
00:10:27,399 --> 00:10:29,039
Mr. Ernest Worthing.

169
00:10:29,320 --> 00:10:31,360
Jack! I don't seem to remember inviting you.

170
00:10:31,559 --> 00:10:34,360
No. You are absurdly careless|about sending out invitations.

171
00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:38,320
Cucumber sandwiches? Why such reckless|extravagance in one so young?

172
00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:40,759
Don't you touch them. They are ordered|specially for Aunt Augusta.

173
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:43,720
- Well, you are eating them.|- That is quite a different matter. She's my aunt.

174
00:10:44,840 --> 00:10:47,960
Have some bread and butter.|The bread and butter is for Gwendolen.

175
00:10:50,080 --> 00:10:52,440
Gwendolen is devoted to bread and butter.

176
00:10:53,080 --> 00:10:55,279
And very good bread and butter it is too.

177
00:10:55,759 --> 00:10:58,200
My dear fellow, you need not eat as if|you were going to eat it all.

178
00:10:58,399 --> 00:11:00,360
You behave as if you were married to her already.

179
00:11:00,759 --> 00:11:03,399
You are not married to her already,|and I don't think you ever will be.

180
00:11:03,559 --> 00:11:04,679
Now, Algy...

181
00:11:05,679 --> 00:11:07,080
That must be Aunt Augusta.

182
00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:10,279
Only relatives or creditors ever ring|in that Wagnerian manner.

183
00:11:10,440 --> 00:11:13,399
Now, if I can get her out the way for 10 minutes,|in order that you may have the opportunity

184
00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:16,879
for proposing to Gwendolen, may I dine|with you at Willis's tonight?

185
00:11:17,679 --> 00:11:19,080
I suppose so, if you want to.

186
00:11:19,240 --> 00:11:22,039
Yes, but you must be serious about it. I hate|people who are not serious about meals.

187
00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:31,000
Lady Bracknell and Miss Fairfax.

188
00:11:31,159 --> 00:11:32,960
Good afternoon, dear Algernon,

189
00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:35,600
I hope you are behaving very well.

190
00:11:35,879 --> 00:11:37,440
I'm feeling very well, Aunt Augusta.

191
00:11:37,639 --> 00:11:39,440
That's not quite the same thing.

192
00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:42,559
In fact the two things rarely go together.

193
00:11:45,480 --> 00:11:47,120
How do you do, Mr. Worthing.

194
00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:49,519
Dear me, Gwendolen, you are smart!

195
00:11:49,720 --> 00:11:51,039
I am always smart!

196
00:11:51,840 --> 00:11:53,039
Aren't I, Mr. Worthing?

197
00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:55,720
You're quite perfect, Miss Fairfax.

198
00:11:56,440 --> 00:11:58,080
Oh! I hope I am not that.

199
00:11:58,639 --> 00:12:01,000
It would leave no room for developments,

200
00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:03,080
and I intend to develop

201
00:12:03,279 --> 00:12:05,559
- in many directions.|- Gwendolen.

202
00:12:06,639 --> 00:12:08,759
Won't you come and sit here, Gwendolen?

203
00:12:09,639 --> 00:12:12,679
Thank you, mamma. I am quite|comfortable where I am.

204
00:12:13,559 --> 00:12:16,360
I'm sorry if we are a little late, Algernon,

205
00:12:16,600 --> 00:12:19,320
but I was obliged to call on dear Lady Harbury.

206
00:12:19,679 --> 00:12:22,519
I hadn't been there since her|poor husband's death.

207
00:12:22,720 --> 00:12:24,919
I never saw a woman so altered;

208
00:12:25,120 --> 00:12:27,559
she looks quite twenty years younger.

209
00:12:28,600 --> 00:12:30,240
And now I'll have a cup of tea,

210
00:12:30,399 --> 00:12:34,000
and one of those nice cucumber|sandwiches you promised me.

211
00:12:34,279 --> 00:12:35,559
Certainly, Aunt Augusta.

212
00:12:38,960 --> 00:12:40,240
Good heavens! Lane!

213
00:12:40,519 --> 00:12:43,559
Why are there no cucumber sandwiches?|I ordered them specially.

214
00:12:43,840 --> 00:12:46,399
There were no cucumbers in the market|this morning, sir.

215
00:12:46,559 --> 00:12:48,120
I went down twice.

216
00:12:48,279 --> 00:12:50,480
- No cucumbers!|- No, sir.

217
00:12:50,639 --> 00:12:52,200
Not even for ready money.

218
00:12:52,559 --> 00:12:54,200
Thank you, Lane. That will do.

219
00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:57,240
I am greatly distressed, Aunt Augusta,|about there being no cucumbers,

220
00:12:57,399 --> 00:13:00,919
- not even for ready money.|- It really makes no matter, Algernon.

221
00:13:01,159 --> 00:13:03,440
I had some crumpets with Lady Harbury,

222
00:13:03,919 --> 00:13:06,960
who seems to me to be living|entirely for pleasure now.

223
00:13:07,159 --> 00:13:09,840
I hear her hair has turned quite gold from grief.

224
00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:12,519
It certainly has changed its colour.

225
00:13:12,840 --> 00:13:15,720
From what cause I, of course, cannot say.

226
00:13:17,399 --> 00:13:18,600
Forgive me, Aunt Augusta,

227
00:13:18,799 --> 00:13:21,080
But I am afraid I shall have to give up|the pleasure of dining with you tonight.

228
00:13:21,559 --> 00:13:23,200
I hope not, Algernon.

229
00:13:23,360 --> 00:13:25,240
It would put my table completely out.

230
00:13:25,399 --> 00:13:28,919
Well, the fact is I have just had a|telegram to say that my poor friend

231
00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:31,559
Bunbury is very ill again.

232
00:13:32,080 --> 00:13:33,519
They seem to think I should be with him.

233
00:13:33,679 --> 00:13:34,720
Well, I must say,

234
00:13:34,960 --> 00:13:38,919
I should be much obliged if you would|ask Mr. Bunbury, from me,

235
00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:41,840
not to have a relapse on Saturday,

236
00:13:42,600 --> 00:13:45,320
for I rely on you to arrange my music for me.

237
00:13:45,879 --> 00:13:47,519
It is my last reception,

238
00:13:47,679 --> 00:13:50,480
and one wants something that will|encourage conversation,

239
00:13:51,159 --> 00:13:53,279
particularly at the end of the season

240
00:13:53,480 --> 00:13:56,679
when every one has practically said|whatever they had to say,

241
00:13:56,960 --> 00:13:59,759
which, in most cases, was probably not much.

242
00:14:00,360 --> 00:14:03,559
I'll speak to Bunbury, Aunt Augusta,|if he is still conscious,

243
00:14:03,759 --> 00:14:06,720
and I think I can promise you that|he'll be all right by Saturday.

244
00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:09,519
Of course the music is a great difficulty.

245
00:14:10,480 --> 00:14:11,679
But I'll run over the programme

246
00:14:11,840 --> 00:14:14,279
I've worked out, if you will come|into the other room.

247
00:14:14,519 --> 00:14:17,039
Thank you, Algernon.|That's very thoughtful of you.

248
00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:19,759
I'm sure the programme will be delightful,

249
00:14:20,120 --> 00:14:22,240
after a few expurgations.

250
00:14:22,879 --> 00:14:25,519
French songs I cannot possibly allow.

251
00:14:25,799 --> 00:14:28,080
People always seem to think|that they are improper,

252
00:14:28,519 --> 00:14:30,960
and either look shocked, which is vulgar,

253
00:14:31,159 --> 00:14:32,960
or laugh, which is worse.

254
00:14:33,639 --> 00:14:36,919
German sounds a thoroughly respectable language,

255
00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:39,840
and indeed, I believe it is so.

256
00:14:40,519 --> 00:14:42,960
Gwendolen, you will accompany me.

257
00:14:43,879 --> 00:14:45,159
Certainly, mamma.

258
00:14:48,799 --> 00:14:51,159
Well, here is the programme I suggest,|Aunt Augusta.

259
00:14:51,720 --> 00:14:53,840
Charming day it has been, Miss Fairfax.

260
00:14:54,039 --> 00:14:57,000
Pray don't talk to me about the|weather, Mr. Worthing.

261
00:14:57,960 --> 00:15:01,320
Whenever people talk to me about the weather,|I always feel quite certain they mean

262
00:15:01,519 --> 00:15:02,720
something else.

263
00:15:03,080 --> 00:15:04,399
And that makes me so nervous.

264
00:15:04,559 --> 00:15:06,919
I do mean something else.

265
00:15:07,120 --> 00:15:09,679
I thought so. In fact, I am never wrong.

266
00:15:09,840 --> 00:15:12,720
I would like to be allowed to take advantage|of Lady Bracknell's temporary absence...

267
00:15:12,919 --> 00:15:14,720
I would certainly advise you to do so.

268
00:15:14,879 --> 00:15:17,840
Mamma has a way of coming back|suddenly into a room

269
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,200
that I have often had to speak to her about.

270
00:15:22,240 --> 00:15:23,440
Miss Fairfax,

271
00:15:24,159 --> 00:15:26,879
ever since I met you I have admired you more than

272
00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:28,879
any girl I have ever met,

273
00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:30,960
since I met you.

274
00:15:31,200 --> 00:15:33,960
Yes, I am quite aware of the fact.

275
00:15:34,440 --> 00:15:38,200
And I often wish that in public, at any rate,|you had been more demonstrative.

276
00:15:38,679 --> 00:15:42,360
For me you have always had an|irresistible fascination.

277
00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:45,559
Even before I met you I was far|from indifferent to you.

278
00:15:46,039 --> 00:15:49,159
We live, as I hope you know, Mr Worthing,

279
00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:51,440
in an age of ideals.

280
00:15:51,879 --> 00:15:55,399
and my ideal has always been to love|some one of the name of Ernest.

281
00:15:55,759 --> 00:15:59,120
There is something in that name which|inspires absolute confidence.

282
00:15:59,639 --> 00:16:03,240
The moment Algernon first mentioned to me|that he had a friend called Ernest,

283
00:16:04,559 --> 00:16:06,200
I knew I was destined to love you.

284
00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:10,840
You really...

285
00:16:11,399 --> 00:16:12,960
love me, Gwendolen?

286
00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:14,759
Passionately!

287
00:16:15,720 --> 00:16:16,679
Darling!

288
00:16:18,679 --> 00:16:20,240
You don't know how happy you've made me.

289
00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:22,080
My own Ernest!

290
00:16:23,279 --> 00:16:26,559
But you don't really mean to say that you|couldn't love me if my name wasn't Ernest?

291
00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:28,639
But your name is Ernest.

292
00:16:29,080 --> 00:16:30,600
Yes, I know it is.

293
00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:33,720
But supposing it was something else?

294
00:16:34,799 --> 00:16:36,919
Do you mean to say you couldn't love me then?

295
00:16:38,039 --> 00:16:41,639
That is clearly a metaphysical speculation,|and like most metaphysical speculations

296
00:16:41,799 --> 00:16:44,840
has very little reference at all to|the actual facts of real life,

297
00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:46,240
as we know them.

298
00:16:46,519 --> 00:16:48,559
Personally, darling, to speak candidly,

299
00:16:48,840 --> 00:16:51,200
I don't much care about the name of Ernest.

300
00:16:51,600 --> 00:16:53,559
I don't think the name suits me at all.

301
00:16:53,759 --> 00:16:56,720
It suits you perfectly. It is a divine name.

302
00:16:57,039 --> 00:16:58,840
It has a music of its own.

303
00:16:59,120 --> 00:17:01,759
It produces vibrations.

304
00:17:02,759 --> 00:17:04,559
Well, I must say, Gwendolen,

305
00:17:04,759 --> 00:17:07,559
that I think there are lots of other|much nicer names.

306
00:17:07,799 --> 00:17:09,160
I think...

307
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:10,720
Jack, for instance.

308
00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:12,839
- A charming name!|- Jack?

309
00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:14,599
Oh, no!

310
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:18,279
There is very little music in the name Jack,|if any at all, indeed.

311
00:17:18,480 --> 00:17:20,599
I have known several Jacks,

312
00:17:20,759 --> 00:17:23,720
and they all, without exception,|were more than usually plain.

313
00:17:24,519 --> 00:17:27,480
Besides, Jack is a notorious|domesticity for John!

314
00:17:27,720 --> 00:17:30,759
And I pity any woman who is married|to a man called John.

315
00:17:31,799 --> 00:17:34,599
No, the only really safe name

316
00:17:35,079 --> 00:17:36,279
is Ernest.

317
00:17:37,359 --> 00:17:38,640
Gwendolen...

318
00:17:38,799 --> 00:17:40,759
I must get christened at once!

319
00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:42,640
I mean, we must get married at once!

320
00:17:44,039 --> 00:17:45,599
Married, Mr. Worthing?

321
00:17:46,279 --> 00:17:47,839
Well..., surely.

322
00:17:48,359 --> 00:17:50,720
You know that I love you, and you|have led me to believe,

323
00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:53,599
Miss Fairfax, that you were not|entirely indifferent to me.

324
00:17:54,839 --> 00:17:57,559
I adore you. But you haven't proposed to me yet.

325
00:17:58,400 --> 00:17:59,519
Well...

326
00:17:59,799 --> 00:18:01,240
May I propose to you now?

327
00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:04,799
I think it would be an admirable opportunity.

328
00:18:06,240 --> 00:18:09,039
And to spare you any possible|disappointment, Mr. Worthing,

329
00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:12,559
I think it only fair to tell you quite|frankly before-hand

330
00:18:12,920 --> 00:18:15,039
that I am fully determined to accept you.

331
00:18:16,319 --> 00:18:17,279
Gwendolen!

332
00:18:19,279 --> 00:18:20,759
Yes, Mr. Worthing?

333
00:18:21,720 --> 00:18:23,279
What have you got to say to me?

334
00:18:23,839 --> 00:18:25,960
But you know what I have got to say to you.

335
00:18:26,559 --> 00:18:27,599
Yes, but you don't say it.

336
00:18:40,640 --> 00:18:41,680
Gwendolen...

337
00:18:42,559 --> 00:18:44,039
Will you marry me?

338
00:18:44,200 --> 00:18:45,839
Of course I will, darling.

339
00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:47,960
How long you have been about it!

340
00:18:48,559 --> 00:18:51,000
I am afraid you have had very little|experience in how to propose.

341
00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:54,079
My own one, I have never loved|any one in the world but you.

342
00:18:54,720 --> 00:18:57,759
Yes, but men often propose for practice.

343
00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:01,279
I know my brother does.|All my girl-friends tell me so.

344
00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:05,440
What wonderfully blue eyes you have, Ernest!

345
00:19:06,319 --> 00:19:07,960
They are quite, quite,

346
00:19:08,240 --> 00:19:09,359
blue.

347
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:12,480
I hope you will always look at me just like that,

348
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:15,359
especially when there are other people present.

349
00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:20,880
Mr. Worthing!

350
00:19:21,279 --> 00:19:24,319
Rise, sir, from this semi-recumbent

351
00:19:24,519 --> 00:19:27,400
posture. It is most indecorous.

352
00:19:28,279 --> 00:19:32,640
Mamma! I must beg you to retire.|This is no place for you.

353
00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:36,720
Besides, Mr. Worthing has not quite finished yet.

354
00:19:37,160 --> 00:19:40,599
Finished what, may I ask?

355
00:19:42,960 --> 00:19:45,160
I am engaged to Mr. Worthing, mamma.

356
00:19:45,319 --> 00:19:47,440
Pardon me, you are not engaged to any one.

357
00:19:48,079 --> 00:19:50,200
When you do become engaged to some one,

358
00:19:50,519 --> 00:19:54,799
I, or your father, should his health permit him,|will inform you of the fact.

359
00:19:55,640 --> 00:19:58,680
An engagement should come on|a young girl as a surprise,

360
00:19:59,279 --> 00:20:02,000
pleasant or unpleasant, as the case may be.

361
00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:05,480
It is hardly a matter that she could be|allowed to arrange for herself.

362
00:20:06,119 --> 00:20:09,319
And now I have a few questions|to put to you, Mr. Worthing.

363
00:20:09,920 --> 00:20:13,920
While I am making these inquiries,|you, Gwendolen,

364
00:20:14,279 --> 00:20:16,880
will wait for me below in the carriage.

365
00:20:17,279 --> 00:20:18,319
Mamma!

366
00:20:18,519 --> 00:20:21,119
In the carriage, Gwendolen!

367
00:20:39,119 --> 00:20:40,160
Gwendolen,

368
00:20:40,799 --> 00:20:41,920
the carriage!

369
00:20:43,119 --> 00:20:44,240
Yes, mamma.

370
00:20:46,759 --> 00:20:48,720
You can take a seat, Mr. Worthing.

371
00:20:49,279 --> 00:20:51,720
Thank you, Lady Bracknell, I prefer standing.

372
00:20:52,079 --> 00:20:56,359
I feel bound to tell you that you are not|down on my list of eligible young men,

373
00:20:56,559 --> 00:21:00,839
although I have the same list as|the dear Duchess of Bolton has.

374
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:02,640
We work together, in fact.

375
00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:05,519
But I am quite ready to enter your name,

376
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:09,079
should your answers be what a|really affectionate mother requires.

377
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:10,880
Do you smoke?

378
00:21:12,240 --> 00:21:13,759
Well, yes, I must admit I smoke.

379
00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:18,119
I am glad to hear it. A man should|have an occupation of some kind.

380
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:20,519
I have always been of opinion

381
00:21:21,279 --> 00:21:23,640
that a man who desires to get married

382
00:21:23,799 --> 00:21:27,079
should either know everything or nothing.

383
00:21:27,920 --> 00:21:29,119
Which do you know?

384
00:21:32,160 --> 00:21:33,359
I know nothing, Lady Bracknell.

385
00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:35,519
I am pleased to hear it.

386
00:21:35,799 --> 00:21:39,759
I do not approve of anything that|tampers with natural ignorance.

387
00:21:41,119 --> 00:21:44,079
Ignorance is like a delicate exotic fruit;

388
00:21:44,599 --> 00:21:46,480
touch it and the bloom is gone.

389
00:21:47,279 --> 00:21:50,720
The whole theory of modern education|is radically unsound.

390
00:21:51,319 --> 00:21:55,680
Fortunately in England, at any rate, education|produces no effect whatsoever.

391
00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:58,119
What is your income?

392
00:21:58,480 --> 00:22:00,599
Between seven and eight thousand a year.

393
00:22:00,759 --> 00:22:02,960
In land, or in investments?

394
00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:04,720
In investments, chiefly.

395
00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:07,599
That is satisfactory. What between the duties

396
00:22:07,799 --> 00:22:10,079
expected of one during one's lifetime,

397
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:13,200
and the duties exacted from one after one's death,

398
00:22:13,519 --> 00:22:16,640
land has ceased to be either|a profit or a pleasure.

399
00:22:17,119 --> 00:22:20,319
It gives one position, but prevents|one from keeping it up.

400
00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:22,680
That's all that can be said about land.

401
00:22:23,359 --> 00:22:26,559
I have a country house with some land,|of course, attached to it, about

402
00:22:26,759 --> 00:22:30,440
fifteen hundred acres, I believe; but I|don't depend on that for my real income.

403
00:22:31,039 --> 00:22:33,240
In fact, as far as I can make out,

404
00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:36,200
the poachers are the only people|who make anything out of it.

405
00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:41,279
You have a town house, I hope?

406
00:22:41,599 --> 00:22:45,039
A girl with a simple, unspoiled|nature, like Gwendolen,

407
00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:47,799
can hardly be expected to reside in the country.

408
00:22:48,680 --> 00:22:52,680
Well, I own a house in Belgrave Square, but|it is let by the year to Lady Bloxham.

409
00:22:52,839 --> 00:22:54,559
Lady Bloxham?

410
00:22:55,599 --> 00:22:56,960
No, I don't know her.

411
00:22:57,200 --> 00:23:00,400
Oh, she goes about very little.|She is a lady considerably advanced

412
00:23:00,599 --> 00:23:01,720
in years.

413
00:23:02,279 --> 00:23:06,799
Ah, nowadays that is no guarantee|of respectability of character.

414
00:23:08,119 --> 00:23:09,759
What are your politics?

415
00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:13,640
Well, I am afraid I really have none.

416
00:23:13,839 --> 00:23:15,400
I am a Liberal.

417
00:23:16,279 --> 00:23:18,960
Oh, they count as Tories. They dine with us.

418
00:23:19,119 --> 00:23:21,720
Or come in the evening, at any rate.

419
00:23:22,480 --> 00:23:24,759
Now to minor matters.

420
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:28,039
Are your parents living?

421
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:33,400
I have lost both my parents.

422
00:23:33,559 --> 00:23:38,240
To lose one parent, Mr. Worthing,|may be regarded as a misfortune;

423
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:41,400
to lose both looks like carelessness.

424
00:23:42,519 --> 00:23:43,839
Who was your father?

425
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:47,359
I am afraid I really don't know.

426
00:23:48,359 --> 00:23:51,000
The fact is, Lady Bracknell, I said|I had lost both my parents.

427
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:55,359
It would be nearer the truth to say|that my parents seem to have lost me.

428
00:23:56,319 --> 00:23:58,519
I don't actually know who I am by birth.

429
00:23:58,720 --> 00:23:59,920
I was...

430
00:24:01,400 --> 00:24:03,519
Well, I was found.

431
00:24:04,640 --> 00:24:05,839
Found!

432
00:24:07,079 --> 00:24:11,839
The late Mr. Thomas Cardew, an old gentleman|of most charitable and kindly disposition,

433
00:24:12,039 --> 00:24:13,240
found me,

434
00:24:13,400 --> 00:24:16,119
and gave me the name of Worthing, because|he happened to have a first-class ticket

435
00:24:16,279 --> 00:24:18,559
for Worthing in his pocket at the time.

436
00:24:19,319 --> 00:24:21,519
Worthing is a place in Sussex.

437
00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:23,079
It is a seaside resort.

438
00:24:23,799 --> 00:24:26,359
Where did the charitable gentleman

439
00:24:26,519 --> 00:24:28,480
who had a first-class ticket

440
00:24:28,680 --> 00:24:31,720
for this seaside resort find you?

441
00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:34,839
In a hand-bag.

442
00:24:35,839 --> 00:24:38,279
A hand-bag?

443
00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:42,359
Yes, Lady Bracknell. I was in a hand-bag.

444
00:24:42,519 --> 00:24:46,279
A somewhat large, black leather hand-bag,

445
00:24:47,599 --> 00:24:49,000
with handles to it.

446
00:24:49,440 --> 00:24:50,920
An ordinary hand-bag in fact.

447
00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:53,480
In what locality,

448
00:24:53,640 --> 00:24:57,680
did this Mr. James, or Thomas, Cardew

449
00:24:57,960 --> 00:25:01,079
come across this ordinary hand-bag?

450
00:25:02,480 --> 00:25:05,680
In the cloak-room at Victoria Station.|It was given to him in mistake for his own.

451
00:25:05,839 --> 00:25:08,799
The cloak-room at Victoria Station?

452
00:25:09,720 --> 00:25:11,680
Yes. The Brighton line.

453
00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:14,440
The line is immaterial.

454
00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:19,359
Mr. Worthing,

455
00:25:21,400 --> 00:25:25,279
I confess I feel somewhat bewildered|by what you have just told me.

456
00:25:26,039 --> 00:25:29,920
To be born, or at any rate bred, in a hand-bag,

457
00:25:30,079 --> 00:25:32,279
whether it had handles or not,

458
00:25:32,480 --> 00:25:36,920
seems to me to display a contempt|for the ordinary decencies of family life

459
00:25:37,319 --> 00:25:40,839
that reminds one of the worst|excesses of the French Revolution.

460
00:25:41,480 --> 00:25:45,240
And I presume you know what that|unfortunate movement led to?

461
00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:48,559
May I ask you then what you would advise me to do?

462
00:25:48,839 --> 00:25:52,279
I need hardly say I would do anything in the|world to ensure Gwendolen's happiness.

463
00:25:52,759 --> 00:25:55,400
I would strongly advise you, Mr. Worthing,

464
00:25:55,599 --> 00:25:59,119
to try and acquire some relations|as soon as possible,

465
00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:02,079
and to make a definite effort to produce

466
00:26:02,279 --> 00:26:05,400
at any rate one parent, of either sex,

467
00:26:05,599 --> 00:26:08,400
before the season is quite over.

468
00:26:08,759 --> 00:26:11,359
Well, I don't see how I could possibly|do that, Lady Bracknell.

469
00:26:11,519 --> 00:26:16,200
I can produce the hand-bag. It is in my dressing-|room. I really think that ought to satisfy you.

470
00:26:16,400 --> 00:26:19,240
Me, sir! What has it to do with me?

471
00:26:19,799 --> 00:26:22,759
You can hardly imagine that I and Lord Bracknell

472
00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:25,279
would dream of allowing our only daughter,

473
00:26:25,480 --> 00:26:28,119
a girl brought up with the utmost care,

474
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:30,519
to marry into a cloak-room,

475
00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:33,880
and form an alliance with a parcel?

476
00:26:34,559 --> 00:26:36,680
Good morning, Mr. Worthing!

477
00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:40,480
Good morning, Lady Bracknell.

478
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:58,039
Algy, for heaven's sake stop playing|that ghastly tune.

479
00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:02,200
Didn't it go off all right, old boy?

480
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:03,920
You mean to say Gwendolen refused you?

481
00:27:04,119 --> 00:27:07,000
Gwendolen is as right as a trivet. As far|as she is concerned, we are engaged.

482
00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:09,599
Her mother is an absolute Gorgon.

483
00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:13,519
I don't really know what a Gorgon is, but|I am quite sure that Lady Bracknell is one.

484
00:27:13,720 --> 00:27:17,599
In any case, she is a monster, without|being a myth, which is rather unfair.

485
00:27:19,319 --> 00:27:20,519
Algy...

486
00:27:20,720 --> 00:27:23,599
You don't suppose that Gwendolen will|become like her mother in about

487
00:27:23,759 --> 00:27:25,960
one hundred and fifty years, do you?

488
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:29,240
All women become like their mothers.|That is their tragedy.

489
00:27:29,400 --> 00:27:31,440
No man does. That's his.

490
00:27:32,200 --> 00:27:33,240
Is that clever?

491
00:27:33,480 --> 00:27:34,960
It is perfectly phrased!

492
00:27:35,119 --> 00:27:38,240
And quite as true as any observation|in civilised life should be.

493
00:27:38,880 --> 00:27:43,000
Did you tell Gwendolen the truth about your|being Ernest in town, and Jack in the country?

494
00:27:43,119 --> 00:27:47,160
My dear fellow, the truth isn't quite|the sort of thing one tells to a nice,

495
00:27:47,319 --> 00:27:48,960
sweet, refined girl.

496
00:27:49,119 --> 00:27:52,160
Besides, before the end of the week,|I shall have got rid of Ernest.

497
00:27:52,359 --> 00:27:56,240
My poor brother Ernest is going to be|carried off quite suddenly,

498
00:27:56,680 --> 00:27:58,880
in Paris, by a severe chill.

499
00:27:59,440 --> 00:28:01,559
But I thought you said that your..., your ward,

500
00:28:01,759 --> 00:28:03,960
was a little too much interested in|your poor brother Ernest?

501
00:28:04,160 --> 00:28:05,799
Won't she feel his loss a good deal?

502
00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:08,640
Oh, Cecily is not a silly romantic girl,|I am happy to say.

503
00:28:08,799 --> 00:28:11,359
She has got a capital appetite,|goes for long walks,

504
00:28:11,559 --> 00:28:13,440
and pays no attention at all to her lessons.

505
00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:15,359
I would rather like to see Cecily.

506
00:28:15,720 --> 00:28:17,920
I shall take very good care you never do.

507
00:28:18,119 --> 00:28:20,160
She is excessively pretty, and|only just eighteen.

508
00:28:20,359 --> 00:28:23,559
Have you told Gwendolen that you have an|excessively pretty ward who is only just 18?

509
00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:26,160
One doesn't blurt these things out to people.

510
00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:28,920
Cecily and Gwendolen are perfectly certain|to be extremely good friends.

511
00:28:29,079 --> 00:28:32,200
I'll bet you anything that half an hour after they|have met, they will be calling each other sister.

512
00:28:33,720 --> 00:28:37,319
Women only do that when they have called|each other a lot of other things first.

513
00:28:38,599 --> 00:28:39,960
Miss Fairfax.

514
00:28:41,079 --> 00:28:42,799
Algy, kindly turn your back.

515
00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:45,200
I have something very particular|to say to Mr. Worthing.

516
00:28:45,359 --> 00:28:47,559
Really, Gwendolen, I don't think|I can allow this at all.

517
00:28:47,680 --> 00:28:49,319
Ernest, we may never be married.

518
00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:52,240
From the expression on mamma's|face I fear we never shall.

519
00:28:52,759 --> 00:28:55,039
But although she may prevent us|from becoming man and wife,

520
00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:59,160
nothing that she can possibly do can|alter my eternal devotion to you.

521
00:28:59,319 --> 00:29:03,079
Your, your Christian name has an|irresistible fascination.

522
00:29:03,599 --> 00:29:06,799
The simplicity of your character|makes you exquisitely

523
00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:08,319
incomprehensible to me.

524
00:29:08,559 --> 00:29:11,599
Your town address I have.|What is your address in the country?

525
00:29:12,480 --> 00:29:14,599
The Manor House, Woolton, Hertfordshire.

526
00:29:14,799 --> 00:29:16,680
There is a good postal service, I suppose?

527
00:29:16,839 --> 00:29:19,119
It may be necessary to do something desperate.

528
00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:23,680
The Manor House, Woolton,

529
00:29:23,880 --> 00:29:25,839
Hertfordshire.

530
00:29:27,119 --> 00:29:28,319
My own one!

531
00:29:33,279 --> 00:29:35,559
- Cecily!|- Yes, Miss Prism?

532
00:29:43,920 --> 00:29:44,960
Cecily!

533
00:29:46,680 --> 00:29:48,400
Come here at once, child.

534
00:29:53,799 --> 00:29:56,519
We should have been at our labours|quite twenty minutes ago, Cecily.

535
00:29:56,880 --> 00:30:00,160
Unfortunately I was detained by a slight|mishap to my...

536
00:30:01,079 --> 00:30:03,039
Oh, well, never mind to that.

537
00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:05,279
Your German grammar is on the table.

538
00:30:07,599 --> 00:30:09,240
But I don't like German.

539
00:30:09,599 --> 00:30:12,039
It isn't at all a becoming language.

540
00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:16,240
I know perfectly well that I look quite|plain after my German lesson.

541
00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:20,519
Child, you know how anxious your guardian is|that you should improve yourself in every way.

542
00:30:20,799 --> 00:30:24,559
He laid particular stress on your German,|as he was leaving for town yesterday.

543
00:30:25,160 --> 00:30:28,440
Indeed, he always lays stress on your|German when he is leaving for town.

544
00:30:29,039 --> 00:30:32,240
We will repeat yesterday's lesson. Genders.

545
00:30:32,759 --> 00:30:35,319
Dear Uncle Jack is so very serious!

546
00:30:36,119 --> 00:30:39,079
Sometimes he is so serious that I think|he cannot be quite well.

547
00:30:39,240 --> 00:30:41,519
Your guardian enjoys the best of health,

548
00:30:41,720 --> 00:30:43,519
and his gravity of demeanour

549
00:30:44,319 --> 00:30:47,839
is especially to be commanded in one so

550
00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:49,559
comparatively young as he is.

551
00:30:49,720 --> 00:30:53,000
I know no one who has a higher sense|of duty and responsibility.

552
00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:56,359
I suppose that is why he often looks a|little bored when we three are together.

553
00:30:56,559 --> 00:30:58,279
Cecily! I am surprised at you.

554
00:30:58,680 --> 00:31:00,799
Mr. Worthing has many troubles in his life.

555
00:31:01,240 --> 00:31:04,839
Idle merriment and triviality would be|out of place in his conversation.

556
00:31:05,680 --> 00:31:10,039
You must remember his constant anxiety|about that unfortunate young man,

557
00:31:10,200 --> 00:31:11,599
his brother Ernest.

558
00:31:12,200 --> 00:31:16,640
I wish Uncle Jack would allow that|unfortunate young man,

559
00:31:16,839 --> 00:31:18,400
his brother Ernest,

560
00:31:18,720 --> 00:31:20,240
to come down here sometimes.

561
00:31:26,599 --> 00:31:28,319
Diminutives are always neuter.

562
00:31:28,519 --> 00:31:30,559
That is, they belong to neither sex,

563
00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:32,839
even one appearances are to the contrary.

564
00:31:33,880 --> 00:31:35,079
As for example:

565
00:31:35,359 --> 00:31:37,400
{y:i}das Fr�ulein, young lady.

566
00:31:37,680 --> 00:31:39,720
{y:i}das M�dchen, the young girl.

567
00:31:40,799 --> 00:31:42,680
Put away your diary, Cecily!

568
00:31:43,079 --> 00:31:45,599
I really don't see why you should|keep a diary at all.

569
00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:48,119
I keep a diary

570
00:31:48,279 --> 00:31:51,880
in order to enter the wonderful|secrets of my life.

571
00:31:53,200 --> 00:31:56,240
If I didn't write them down, I should|probably forget all about them.

572
00:31:56,440 --> 00:32:00,319
Memory, my dear Cecily, is the diary|that we all carry about with us.

573
00:32:00,759 --> 00:32:03,640
Yes, but it usually chronicles the|things that have never happened,

574
00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:05,680
and couldn't possibly have happened.

575
00:32:05,839 --> 00:32:08,559
I believe that Memory is responsible|for nearly all

576
00:32:08,759 --> 00:32:10,799
the three-volume novels|that the library sends us.

577
00:32:10,960 --> 00:32:13,400
Do not speak slightingly of the|three-volume novel.

578
00:32:14,079 --> 00:32:16,880
I wrote one myself in earlier days.

579
00:32:17,839 --> 00:32:19,720
Did you really, Miss Prism?

580
00:32:20,119 --> 00:32:22,759
How wonderfully clever you are!

581
00:32:23,680 --> 00:32:25,400
I hope it did not end happily?

582
00:32:25,640 --> 00:32:27,759
I don't like novels that end happily.

583
00:32:29,119 --> 00:32:31,720
The good ended happily, and the bad unhappily.

584
00:32:32,400 --> 00:32:34,200
That is what Fiction means.

585
00:32:34,640 --> 00:32:37,000
I suppose so. And was it ever published?

586
00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:38,440
Alas! No.

587
00:32:39,079 --> 00:32:41,519
The manuscript unfortunately was abandoned.

588
00:32:41,799 --> 00:32:44,000
I use the word in the sense of lost

589
00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:45,440
or mislaid.

590
00:32:46,079 --> 00:32:47,519
Now to your work, child.

591
00:32:47,960 --> 00:32:50,079
These speculations are profitless.

592
00:32:51,200 --> 00:32:54,480
But I see dear Dr. Chasuble coming up|through the garden.

593
00:32:58,279 --> 00:33:00,640
And how are we this morning?

594
00:33:01,119 --> 00:33:03,079
Miss Prism, you are, I trust, well?

595
00:33:03,279 --> 00:33:05,400
Dr. Chasuble! This is indeed a pleasure.

596
00:33:05,599 --> 00:33:08,400
Miss Prism has just been complaining|of a slight headache.

597
00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:12,440
I think it would do her so much good|to go for a short stroll

598
00:33:12,640 --> 00:33:14,279
with you in the Park, Dr. Chasuble.

599
00:33:14,480 --> 00:33:16,680
Cecily, I have not mentioned|anything about a headache.

600
00:33:16,880 --> 00:33:21,079
No, I know that, dear Miss Prism, but I felt|instinctively that you had a headache.

601
00:33:21,279 --> 00:33:23,880
Indeed I was thinking about that,|and not about my German lesson,

602
00:33:24,039 --> 00:33:26,000
when the Rector arrived.

603
00:33:26,160 --> 00:33:28,279
I hope, Cecily, you are not inattentive.

604
00:33:28,440 --> 00:33:29,720
Oh, I am afraid I am.

605
00:33:29,880 --> 00:33:31,279
That is strange.

606
00:33:31,839 --> 00:33:34,799
Were I fortunate enough to be Miss Prism's pupil,

607
00:33:35,079 --> 00:33:36,559
I would hang upon her lips.

608
00:33:37,799 --> 00:33:40,839
I spoke metaphorically. My metaphor|was drawn from bees.

609
00:33:41,680 --> 00:33:44,880
Mr. Worthing, I suppose, has not|returned from town yet?

610
00:33:45,200 --> 00:33:47,400
We do not expect him till Monday afternoon.

611
00:33:47,559 --> 00:33:50,079
Ah yes, he usually likes to spend|his Sunday in London.

612
00:33:50,240 --> 00:33:53,599
He is not one of those whose|sole aim is enjoyment,

613
00:33:54,119 --> 00:33:57,720
as, by all accounts, that unfortunate|young man his brother seems to be.

614
00:33:57,880 --> 00:34:01,720
Sad. But I must not disturb Egeria|and her pupil any longer.

615
00:34:01,880 --> 00:34:05,079
Egeria? My name is Laetitia, Doctor.

616
00:34:05,640 --> 00:34:08,679
Laetitia. That is Latin for joy!

617
00:34:10,239 --> 00:34:12,360
Yes. I shall...

618
00:34:12,719 --> 00:34:15,000
I shall see you both no doubt at Evensong?

619
00:34:15,760 --> 00:34:18,199
I think, dear Doctor, I will have|a stroll with you.

620
00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:22,280
I find I have a headache after all,|and a stroll might do it good.

621
00:34:22,440 --> 00:34:25,880
Cecily, you will read your Political|Economy in my absence.

622
00:34:26,159 --> 00:34:28,679
The chapter on the Fall of the Rupee|you may omit.

623
00:34:28,840 --> 00:34:30,400
It is somewhat too sensational.

624
00:34:30,800 --> 00:34:34,239
Even these metallic problems|have their melodramatic side.

625
00:34:38,800 --> 00:34:40,679
Horrid Political Economy!

626
00:34:40,840 --> 00:34:43,639
Horrid Geography! Horrid, horrid German!

627
00:34:48,480 --> 00:34:51,199
You are too much alone, dear Dr. Chasuble.

628
00:34:52,440 --> 00:34:53,800
You should get married.

629
00:34:54,960 --> 00:34:56,000
Oh, no.

630
00:34:56,400 --> 00:34:58,360
You do not seem to realise, dear Doctor,

631
00:34:58,559 --> 00:35:00,519
that by persistently remaining single,

632
00:35:00,719 --> 00:35:03,440
a man converts himself into a|permanent public temptation.

633
00:35:04,559 --> 00:35:06,679
A man should be more careful;

634
00:35:07,000 --> 00:35:09,880
or he may lead weaker vessels astray.

635
00:35:10,719 --> 00:35:13,400
But is a man not equally attractive when married?

636
00:35:13,559 --> 00:35:17,000
No married man is ever attractive|except to his wife.

637
00:35:17,159 --> 00:35:19,360
And often, I've been told, not even to her.

638
00:35:19,719 --> 00:35:23,239
But doesn't that depend on the intellectual|sympathies of the woman?

639
00:35:24,239 --> 00:35:26,519
Maturity can always be depended on.

640
00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:28,840
Ripeness can be trusted.

641
00:35:29,599 --> 00:35:31,079
Young women are green.

642
00:35:31,440 --> 00:35:33,000
I spoke horticulturally.

643
00:35:33,199 --> 00:35:35,480
My metaphor was drawn from fruits.

644
00:35:35,639 --> 00:35:36,760
Fruits, yes.

645
00:35:39,239 --> 00:35:43,360
Mr. Ernest Worthing has just driven|over from the station, Miss.

646
00:35:44,719 --> 00:35:46,599
He has brought his luggage with him.

647
00:35:48,199 --> 00:35:51,159
'Mr. Ernest Worthing, B4, The Albany'

648
00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:54,119
Uncle Jack's brother!

649
00:35:57,079 --> 00:35:59,519
Did you tell him Mr. Worthing was in London?

650
00:35:59,679 --> 00:36:02,480
Yes, Miss. He seemed very much disappointed.

651
00:36:03,360 --> 00:36:06,239
He said he would like to speak|to you privately for a moment.

652
00:36:07,159 --> 00:36:08,880
I have left him in the morning room.

653
00:36:10,440 --> 00:36:11,639
Thank you, Merriman.

654
00:36:18,280 --> 00:36:20,320
I never met a really wicked person before.

655
00:36:21,079 --> 00:36:22,559
I feel rather frightened.

656
00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:25,280
I am so afraid he will look just|like every one else.

657
00:36:39,039 --> 00:36:40,079
He does.

658
00:36:41,119 --> 00:36:43,320
You are my little cousin Cecily, aren't you?

659
00:36:44,800 --> 00:36:47,760
You are under some strange misapprehension.

660
00:36:48,320 --> 00:36:52,599
I am not little. In fact, I believe I am|more than usually tall for my age.

661
00:36:53,639 --> 00:36:55,599
But I am your cousin Cecily.

662
00:36:56,800 --> 00:36:59,480
You, I see from your card,|are Uncle Jack's brother,

663
00:36:59,840 --> 00:37:01,159
my cousin Ernest.

664
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:04,119
My wicked cousin Ernest.

665
00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:07,760
Oh! I am not really wicked at all, cousin Cecily.

666
00:37:08,239 --> 00:37:09,719
You mustn't think I am wicked.

667
00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:12,199
If you are not,

668
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:16,320
then you have certainly been deceiving us all|in a very inexcusable manner.

669
00:37:17,199 --> 00:37:20,719
I hope you have not been leading a double life,

670
00:37:21,800 --> 00:37:23,840
pretending to be wicked

671
00:37:24,039 --> 00:37:25,840
and being really good all the time.

672
00:37:26,159 --> 00:37:27,800
That would be hypocrisy.

673
00:37:30,239 --> 00:37:32,039
Oh! Of course I have been

674
00:37:32,239 --> 00:37:34,800
- rather reckless.|- I am glad to hear it.

675
00:37:35,159 --> 00:37:37,760
In fact, now you mention the subject,|I really have been

676
00:37:37,920 --> 00:37:40,360
very bad in my own small way.

677
00:37:40,880 --> 00:37:43,320
I don't think you should be so proud of that,

678
00:37:44,039 --> 00:37:46,079
though I am sure it must have been very pleasant.

679
00:37:46,360 --> 00:37:48,000
It is much pleasanter being here with you.

680
00:37:48,840 --> 00:37:50,880
I can't understand how you are here at all.

681
00:37:51,079 --> 00:37:53,519
Uncle Jack won't be back till Monday afternoon.

682
00:37:53,679 --> 00:37:57,440
That is a great disappointment. I am obliged to|go up by the first train on Monday morning.

683
00:37:57,639 --> 00:37:59,679
I have a business appointment that I am anxious

684
00:38:01,079 --> 00:38:02,400
to miss?

685
00:38:03,239 --> 00:38:05,440
Couldn't you miss it anywhere but in London?

686
00:38:05,760 --> 00:38:07,320
No: the appointment is in London.

687
00:38:09,760 --> 00:38:12,360
Well, I know, of course,

688
00:38:12,760 --> 00:38:15,719
how important it is not to keep|a business engagement,

689
00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:20,360
but still I think you had better wait|until Uncle Jack arrives.

690
00:38:20,880 --> 00:38:23,079
I know he wants to speak to you|about your emigrating.

691
00:38:24,039 --> 00:38:25,159
My what?

692
00:38:27,000 --> 00:38:29,599
About your emigrating. He has gone|up to buy your outfit.

693
00:38:29,760 --> 00:38:32,039
I certainly wouldn't allow Jack to buy my outfit.

694
00:38:32,400 --> 00:38:34,440
He has no taste at all in neckties.

695
00:38:35,000 --> 00:38:37,360
I don't think you will require neckties.

696
00:38:37,639 --> 00:38:39,360
Uncle Jack is sending you to Australia.

697
00:38:40,320 --> 00:38:41,440
Australia!

698
00:38:42,519 --> 00:38:43,840
I'd sooner die.

699
00:38:44,039 --> 00:38:46,400
Well, he said at dinner on Wednesday night,|that you would have to choose

700
00:38:46,559 --> 00:38:49,840
between this world, the next world,

701
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:51,039
and Australia.

702
00:38:51,239 --> 00:38:54,119
Oh, well! The reports I have of Australia|and the next world,

703
00:38:54,280 --> 00:38:56,159
are not particularly encouraging.

704
00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:59,360
This world is good enough for me, cousin Cecily.

705
00:38:59,880 --> 00:39:02,519
Yes, but are you good enough for it?

706
00:39:04,280 --> 00:39:05,920
Well, no, I'm not that.

707
00:39:06,119 --> 00:39:08,159
That is why I'd like you to reform me.

708
00:39:08,360 --> 00:39:11,320
You might make that your mission,|if you don't mind, cousin Cecily.

709
00:39:11,519 --> 00:39:13,719
I'm afraid I have no time, this afternoon.

710
00:39:14,159 --> 00:39:16,519
Well, would you mind if I reform|myself this afternoon?

711
00:39:17,239 --> 00:39:20,679
It is rather romantic of you.|But I think you should try.

712
00:39:21,280 --> 00:39:22,400
I will.

713
00:39:25,039 --> 00:39:26,519
I feel better already.

714
00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:28,360
You are looking a little worse.

715
00:39:28,760 --> 00:39:30,159
That is because I am hungry.

716
00:39:30,519 --> 00:39:32,079
How thoughtless of me.

717
00:39:32,280 --> 00:39:35,719
I should have remembered that when one|is going to lead an entirely new life,

718
00:39:35,920 --> 00:39:38,440
one requires regular and wholesome meals.

719
00:39:38,719 --> 00:39:40,679
Might I have a buttonhole first?

720
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:43,880
I never have any appetite unless|I have a buttonhole first.

721
00:39:44,440 --> 00:39:45,840
A Marechal Niel?

722
00:39:47,519 --> 00:39:49,400
No, I'd sooner have a pink rose.

723
00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:50,800
Why?

724
00:39:51,280 --> 00:39:53,639
Because you are like a pink rose, Cousin Cecily.

725
00:39:56,119 --> 00:39:59,719
I don't think it can be right for you|to say such things to me.

726
00:40:00,960 --> 00:40:03,239
Miss Prism never talks like that.

727
00:40:03,599 --> 00:40:06,320
Then Miss Prism is a short-sighted old lady.

728
00:40:09,760 --> 00:40:11,639
You are the prettiest girl I ever saw.

729
00:40:12,559 --> 00:40:15,920
Miss Prism says that all good looks are a snare.

730
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:19,440
They are a snare that any sensible|man would like to be caught in.

731
00:40:20,880 --> 00:40:23,679
Oh, I don't think I would care|to catch a sensible man.

732
00:40:24,880 --> 00:40:26,760
I shouldn't know what to talk to him about.

733
00:40:44,480 --> 00:40:45,840
Mr. Worthing!

734
00:40:47,760 --> 00:40:48,800
Mr. Worthing!

735
00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:52,199
Dear Mr. Worthing, I trust this garb of woe

736
00:40:52,360 --> 00:40:54,440
does not betoken some terrible calamity?

737
00:40:57,400 --> 00:40:58,360
My brother.

738
00:40:58,639 --> 00:41:00,760
More shameful debts and extravagance?

739
00:41:03,559 --> 00:41:04,679
Dead!

740
00:41:05,519 --> 00:41:07,480
Your brother Ernest dead?

741
00:41:09,599 --> 00:41:11,480
Quite dead.

742
00:41:13,199 --> 00:41:15,920
What a lesson for him!|I trust he will profit by it.

743
00:41:16,440 --> 00:41:17,800
Mr. Worthing,

744
00:41:18,159 --> 00:41:20,440
I offer you my sincere condolence.

745
00:41:20,599 --> 00:41:25,280
Poor Ernest! He had many faults,|but it is a sad, sad blow.

746
00:41:25,480 --> 00:41:27,360
Very sad indeed.

747
00:41:27,719 --> 00:41:29,039
Were you with him at the end?

748
00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:31,360
No. He died abroad; in Paris, in fact.

749
00:41:31,559 --> 00:41:34,199
I had a telegram last night from|the manager of the Grand Hotel.

750
00:41:34,360 --> 00:41:36,159
Was the cause of death mentioned?

751
00:41:36,360 --> 00:41:37,639
A severe chill, it seems.

752
00:41:38,559 --> 00:41:40,800
As a man sows, so let him reap.

753
00:41:41,320 --> 00:41:43,920
Charity, dear Miss Prism, charity!|None of us are perfect.

754
00:41:44,519 --> 00:41:47,119
I myself am peculiarly susceptible to draughts.

755
00:41:47,599 --> 00:41:49,880
Will the interment take place here?

756
00:41:50,159 --> 00:41:53,280
No. He seems to have expressed a desire|to be buried in Paris.

757
00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:54,920
In Paris!

758
00:41:55,920 --> 00:42:00,280
I fear that hardly points to any very|serious state of mind at the last.

759
00:42:01,039 --> 00:42:02,519
Uncle Jack!

760
00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:04,960
I am so glad to see you back.

761
00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:06,920
But what horrid clothes you have got on!

762
00:42:07,079 --> 00:42:07,800
Cecily!

763
00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:09,360
My child! my child!

764
00:42:09,880 --> 00:42:13,239
Do look happy! I have got such|a surprise for you.

765
00:42:13,719 --> 00:42:15,679
Who do you think is in the dining-room?

766
00:42:15,840 --> 00:42:16,960
Your brother!

767
00:42:17,519 --> 00:42:19,159
- Who?|- Your brother Ernest.

768
00:42:19,360 --> 00:42:20,679
He arrived about half an hour ago.

769
00:42:20,840 --> 00:42:23,480
What nonsense! I haven't got a brother.

770
00:42:23,639 --> 00:42:24,840
Oh, don't say that.

771
00:42:25,039 --> 00:42:29,320
However badly he may have behaved to you|in the past he is still your brother.

772
00:42:30,039 --> 00:42:32,679
You couldn't be so heartless as to disown him.

773
00:42:33,400 --> 00:42:36,920
And you will shake hands with him,|won't you, Uncle Jack?

774
00:42:40,159 --> 00:42:42,280
These are very joyful tidings.

775
00:42:42,880 --> 00:42:45,400
After we had all been resigned to his loss,

776
00:42:45,559 --> 00:42:48,400
his sudden return seems to me|peculiarly distressing.

777
00:42:53,719 --> 00:42:55,599
- Good heavens!|- Brother John,

778
00:42:55,840 --> 00:42:58,800
I have come all the way from London|to tell you how very sorry

779
00:42:58,960 --> 00:43:01,400
I am for all the trouble that I have caused you,

780
00:43:01,599 --> 00:43:04,480
and that I intend to lead a better|life in the future.

781
00:43:05,880 --> 00:43:08,760
Uncle Jack, you are not going to refuse|your own brother's hand?

782
00:43:09,199 --> 00:43:12,320
Nothing will induce me to take his hand.|I consider his coming down here disgraceful.

783
00:43:12,519 --> 00:43:14,239
He knows perfectly well why.

784
00:43:14,440 --> 00:43:17,880
Uncle Jack, do be nice. There is some|good in every one.

785
00:43:18,679 --> 00:43:22,639
Ernest has just been telling me about|his poor invalid friend Mr. Bunbury.

786
00:43:23,199 --> 00:43:24,920
Oh! He has been talking about Bunbury, has he?

787
00:43:25,119 --> 00:43:27,880
Well, I won't have him talk to you about|Bunbury or about anything else.

788
00:43:28,039 --> 00:43:30,880
Of course I admit that all the faults|are on my side.

789
00:43:31,039 --> 00:43:33,679
But I must say I think Brother John's coldness

790
00:43:33,800 --> 00:43:37,199
to me on my first visit here, peculiarly painful.

791
00:43:38,039 --> 00:43:42,400
Uncle Jack, if you won't shake hands|with Ernest I will never forgive you.

792
00:43:42,960 --> 00:43:44,920
- Never forgive me?|- Never.

793
00:43:45,440 --> 00:43:46,639
Never, never!

794
00:43:47,320 --> 00:43:49,519
Well, this is the last time I shall do it.

795
00:43:50,119 --> 00:43:51,440
I think we might leave the brothers together.

796
00:43:51,599 --> 00:43:53,480
Cecily, you will come with us.

797
00:43:54,159 --> 00:43:55,559
Certainly, Miss Prism.

798
00:43:55,840 --> 00:43:58,960
My little task of reconciliation is over.

799
00:44:01,079 --> 00:44:03,800
Algy, you, young scoundrel.|You must leave this place at once.

800
00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:05,599
I don't want any Bunburying here.

801
00:44:06,480 --> 00:44:07,599
Merriman,

802
00:44:07,760 --> 00:44:11,519
order the dog-cart at once. Mr. Ernest|has been called back suddenly to town.

803
00:44:13,880 --> 00:44:14,920
Yes, sir.

804
00:44:16,280 --> 00:44:19,079
What a fearful liar you are, dear Jack. I|have not been called back to town at all.

805
00:44:19,239 --> 00:44:22,119
- Yes, you have.|- I haven't heard any one call me.

806
00:44:22,280 --> 00:44:24,639
Your duty as a gentleman calls you back.

807
00:44:24,960 --> 00:44:28,639
I have never allowed my duty as a gentleman to|interfere with my pleasure to the smallest degree.

808
00:44:28,800 --> 00:44:30,599
I can quite understand that.

809
00:44:31,880 --> 00:44:33,840
Well, Cecily is a darling.

810
00:44:34,079 --> 00:44:36,360
You are not to speak of Miss Cardew|that way. I don't like it.

811
00:44:36,719 --> 00:44:39,519
Well, I don't like your clothes.|You look perfectly grotesque in them.

812
00:44:39,719 --> 00:44:41,199
Why don't you go up and change?

813
00:44:41,719 --> 00:44:46,480
It is childish to be in mourning for a man who|is staying for a week in your house as a guest.

814
00:44:47,320 --> 00:44:50,199
You are not staying with me for a whole|week as a guest or anything else.

815
00:44:50,400 --> 00:44:52,840
You are going to leave this afternoon.|By the 4:05 train.

816
00:44:53,079 --> 00:44:55,920
I certainly should not leave you|as long as you are in mourning.

817
00:44:56,440 --> 00:44:57,880
It would be most unfriendly.

818
00:44:58,039 --> 00:45:00,239
If I were in mourning you would stay|with me, I suppose.

819
00:45:00,400 --> 00:45:02,280
I should think it very unkind if you did not.

820
00:45:02,440 --> 00:45:04,559
Well, will you go if I change my clothes?

821
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:06,360
Yes, if you are not too long.

822
00:45:07,599 --> 00:45:10,480
I never saw a man take so long|to dress, with such little result.

823
00:45:11,400 --> 00:45:15,079
Well, at any rate, that is better than|being always over-dressed as you are.

824
00:45:16,800 --> 00:45:19,000
This Bunburying, as you call it, has

825
00:45:19,159 --> 00:45:21,039
not been a great success for you.

826
00:45:27,199 --> 00:45:29,000
I think it has been a great success.

827
00:45:34,159 --> 00:45:35,360
Did you ring, sir?

828
00:45:35,840 --> 00:45:39,039
Merriman, am I correctly|garbed for a christening?

829
00:45:40,039 --> 00:45:41,320
No, sir.

830
00:45:41,480 --> 00:45:45,840
Black is for funerals and weddings.|White is for christenings.

831
00:45:46,000 --> 00:45:48,199
I'll lay out your tennis clothes.

832
00:45:48,400 --> 00:45:49,679
Thank you, Merriman.

833
00:46:16,119 --> 00:46:18,880
Oh, I thought you were with Uncle Jack.

834
00:46:19,480 --> 00:46:21,440
He's gone to order the dog-cart for me.

835
00:46:21,599 --> 00:46:23,320
Oh, is he going to take you for a nice drive?

836
00:46:23,519 --> 00:46:25,079
He's going to send me away.

837
00:46:26,760 --> 00:46:28,320
Then have we got to part?

838
00:46:28,480 --> 00:46:29,880
I am afraid so.

839
00:46:30,280 --> 00:46:32,000
It's a very painful parting.

840
00:46:32,480 --> 00:46:36,599
It is always painful to part from people whom|one has known for a very brief space of time.

841
00:46:37,519 --> 00:46:40,400
The absence of old friends one can|endure with equanimity.

842
00:46:41,519 --> 00:46:43,400
But even a momentary separation

843
00:46:43,840 --> 00:46:47,360
from anyone to whom one has|just been introduced is almost

844
00:46:48,280 --> 00:46:49,400
unbearable.

845
00:46:49,679 --> 00:46:50,800
Thank you.

846
00:46:52,039 --> 00:46:53,519
The dog-cart is at the door, sir.

847
00:46:57,000 --> 00:47:00,280
It can wait, Merriman for... five minutes.

848
00:47:01,440 --> 00:47:02,559
Yes, Miss.

849
00:47:05,599 --> 00:47:07,880
I hope, Cecily, I shall not offend you

850
00:47:08,039 --> 00:47:09,760
if I state quite openly and frankly

851
00:47:09,960 --> 00:47:13,480
that you seem to me to be in every way the|visible personification of absolute perfection.

852
00:47:13,920 --> 00:47:16,519
I think your frankness does|you great credit, Ernest.

853
00:47:17,039 --> 00:47:20,239
If you will allow me, I will copy|your remarks into my diary.

854
00:47:23,679 --> 00:47:26,119
Do you really keep a diary?|I'd give anything to look at it.

855
00:47:26,679 --> 00:47:28,480
- May I?|- Oh, no.

856
00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:31,360
You see, it is simply a very young girl's record

857
00:47:31,519 --> 00:47:33,559
of her own thoughts and impressions,

858
00:47:33,760 --> 00:47:35,480
and consequently meant for publication.

859
00:47:35,840 --> 00:47:37,800
When it appears in volume form

860
00:47:37,960 --> 00:47:39,280
I hope you will order a copy.

861
00:47:39,440 --> 00:47:42,480
But pray, Ernest, don't stop. I delight|in taking down from dictation.

862
00:47:42,679 --> 00:47:46,119
I have reached 'absolute perfection'.

863
00:47:46,960 --> 00:47:48,840
You can go on. I am quite ready for more.

864
00:47:50,880 --> 00:47:54,000
Oh, don't cough, Ernest. I don't know|how to spell a cough.

865
00:47:55,079 --> 00:47:56,199
Cecily,

866
00:47:56,480 --> 00:48:00,360
ever since I first saw your wonderful|and incomparable perfection,

867
00:48:00,880 --> 00:48:02,840
I have dared to love you wildly,

868
00:48:03,039 --> 00:48:05,159
passionately, devotedly,

869
00:48:05,320 --> 00:48:06,719
hopelessly.

870
00:48:07,280 --> 00:48:10,320
I don't think you should tell me that|you love me wildly,

871
00:48:10,519 --> 00:48:12,880
passionately, devotedly, hopelessly.

872
00:48:13,679 --> 00:48:17,639
Hopelessly doesn't seem to make|much sense, does it?

873
00:48:17,960 --> 00:48:19,159
Cecily!

874
00:48:22,719 --> 00:48:24,599
The dog-cart is waiting, sir.

875
00:48:25,119 --> 00:48:26,679
Tell it to come round next week, at the same hour.

876
00:48:32,599 --> 00:48:33,920
Very good, sir.

877
00:48:38,639 --> 00:48:42,679
Uncle Jack would be very much annoyed if he knew|you're staying on till next week at the same hour.

878
00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:43,880
Oh, I don't care about Jack.

879
00:48:44,880 --> 00:48:47,320
I don't care for anybody in the world but you.

880
00:48:47,920 --> 00:48:49,880
I love you, Cecily. Will you marry me?

881
00:48:50,079 --> 00:48:51,719
Of course.

882
00:48:51,880 --> 00:48:55,239
- We have been engaged for the last 3 months.|- The last 3 months?

883
00:48:55,320 --> 00:48:57,599
Yes, it will be exactly three months on Thursday.

884
00:48:57,800 --> 00:48:59,440
How did we become engaged?

885
00:48:59,840 --> 00:49:03,800
Well, ever since dear Uncle Jack first confessed|to us that he had a younger brother

886
00:49:04,000 --> 00:49:05,800
who was very wicked and bad,

887
00:49:06,199 --> 00:49:09,679
you of course have formed the chief topic of|conversation between myself and Miss Prism.

888
00:49:10,400 --> 00:49:14,079
And of course a man who is much talked|about is always very attractive.

889
00:49:14,400 --> 00:49:16,960
One always feels there must be|something in him, after all.

890
00:49:17,800 --> 00:49:20,760
I daresay it was foolish of me,

891
00:49:22,719 --> 00:49:25,079
- but I fell in love with you, Ernest.|- Darling!

892
00:49:25,679 --> 00:49:27,800
And when was the engagement actually settled?

893
00:49:28,239 --> 00:49:30,280
On the 22nd of February last.

894
00:49:32,159 --> 00:49:34,920
Worn out by your entire ignorance|of my existence,

895
00:49:35,400 --> 00:49:37,679
I determined to end the matter

896
00:49:37,880 --> 00:49:39,440
one way or the other,

897
00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:42,800
and after a long struggle with myself

898
00:49:44,079 --> 00:49:45,559
I accepted you.

899
00:49:46,039 --> 00:49:48,079
Under that dear old chandelier there.

900
00:49:48,639 --> 00:49:52,079
The next day I bought this ring in your name,

901
00:49:52,840 --> 00:49:54,400
and this is the bangle

902
00:49:54,559 --> 00:49:57,920
with the true lover's knot that|I promised you always to wear.

903
00:49:58,480 --> 00:50:01,320
Did I give you this? It's very pretty, isn't it?

904
00:50:01,519 --> 00:50:04,119
Yes, you've wonderfully good taste, Ernest.

905
00:50:04,320 --> 00:50:07,360
It's always been my excuse|for your leading such a bad life.

906
00:50:08,679 --> 00:50:09,639
And this...

907
00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:13,760
This is the box

908
00:50:14,119 --> 00:50:16,480
in which I keep all your dear letters.

909
00:50:16,639 --> 00:50:17,679
My letters!

910
00:50:17,880 --> 00:50:20,159
But, my own sweet Cecily,|I never wrote you any letters.

911
00:50:20,320 --> 00:50:21,960
You need hardly remind me of that, Ernest.

912
00:50:22,119 --> 00:50:25,079
I remember only too well I was forced|to write all your letters for you.

913
00:50:25,440 --> 00:50:28,719
I wrote three times a week, sometimes oftener.

914
00:50:29,119 --> 00:50:31,159
- Oh, let me read them.|- Oh, no. I couldn't possibly.

915
00:50:31,280 --> 00:50:33,559
They would make you far too conceited.

916
00:50:34,400 --> 00:50:36,119
The three you wrote to me

917
00:50:36,400 --> 00:50:38,679
after our engagement had been broken off

918
00:50:39,440 --> 00:50:43,039
are so beautiful, and so badly spelled,

919
00:50:44,360 --> 00:50:47,559
that even now I can hardly read them|without crying a little.

920
00:50:47,719 --> 00:50:49,599
But was our engagement ever broken off?

921
00:50:49,760 --> 00:50:50,960
Of course it was.

922
00:50:51,320 --> 00:50:54,199
On the 22nd of last March.

923
00:50:54,400 --> 00:50:56,119
You can see the entry if you like.

924
00:50:56,280 --> 00:50:59,880
'today I broke off my engagement with|Ernest. I feel it is better to do so.

925
00:51:00,039 --> 00:51:01,920
The weather still continues charming.'

926
00:51:03,519 --> 00:51:06,119
But why on earth did you break it off?|What had I done?

927
00:51:06,760 --> 00:51:08,159
I had done nothing at all.

928
00:51:08,679 --> 00:51:11,280
Cecily, I am very much hurt indeed|that you broke it off.

929
00:51:11,559 --> 00:51:13,199
Particularly when the weather was so charming.

930
00:51:13,360 --> 00:51:16,320
It would hardly have been a really|serious engagement

931
00:51:16,480 --> 00:51:18,679
if it hadn't been broken off at least once.

932
00:51:19,719 --> 00:51:22,079
But I forgave you before the week was out.

933
00:51:22,639 --> 00:51:24,519
What a perfect angel you are!

934
00:51:26,440 --> 00:51:29,480
You won't ever break off our engagement|again, will you?

935
00:51:30,039 --> 00:51:32,760
I don't think I could now that I have|actually met you.

936
00:51:33,719 --> 00:51:36,079
Besides, of course, there is|the question of your name.

937
00:51:37,760 --> 00:51:38,880
Of course.

938
00:51:39,159 --> 00:51:41,199
You must not laugh at me, darling,

939
00:51:41,360 --> 00:51:44,079
but it had always been a girlish dream of mine

940
00:51:44,440 --> 00:51:47,039
to love some one by the name of Ernest.

941
00:51:47,960 --> 00:51:49,920
There is something in that name

942
00:51:50,079 --> 00:51:53,199
that seems to inspire absolute confidence.

943
00:51:53,960 --> 00:51:57,400
Indeed, I pity any poor married woman|whose husband is not called Ernest.

944
00:51:57,679 --> 00:52:00,119
But, my dear child, do you mean to say|you could not love me

945
00:52:00,280 --> 00:52:01,920
- if I had some other name?|- But what name?

946
00:52:02,119 --> 00:52:03,679
Oh, any name you like.

947
00:52:04,840 --> 00:52:06,559
Algernon, for instance.

948
00:52:06,760 --> 00:52:08,800
But I don't like the name of Algernon.

949
00:52:08,960 --> 00:52:11,480
I really don't see why you should|object to the name of

950
00:52:11,639 --> 00:52:13,760
Algernon. It is not a bad name at all.

951
00:52:13,920 --> 00:52:15,800
In fact, it is rather an aristocratic name.

952
00:52:16,000 --> 00:52:18,440
Half the chaps who get into the|Bankruptcy Court are called Algernon.

953
00:52:19,679 --> 00:52:21,000
But seriously, Cecily.

954
00:52:21,320 --> 00:52:23,760
If my name was Algy, couldn't you love me?

955
00:52:24,480 --> 00:52:26,199
I might respect you, Ernest,

956
00:52:26,480 --> 00:52:28,199
I might admire your character,

957
00:52:28,519 --> 00:52:31,960
but I fear that I should not be able|to give you my undivided attention.

958
00:52:32,960 --> 00:52:36,639
Cecily, your vicar here is, I suppose,|thoroughly experienced

959
00:52:36,840 --> 00:52:39,199
in the practice of all the rites and|ceremonials of the Church?

960
00:52:39,360 --> 00:52:41,400
Oh, yes. Dr. Chasuble is a most learned man.

961
00:52:41,559 --> 00:52:44,840
I must see him at once on a most important|christening. I mean on most important business.

962
00:52:45,000 --> 00:52:46,360
- I won't be away more than half an hour.|- Ernest!

963
00:52:49,119 --> 00:52:52,480
Considering that we have been engaged|since February the 22nd,

964
00:52:53,320 --> 00:52:55,880
and that I only met you today for the first time,

965
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:59,440
I think it is rather hard

966
00:52:59,679 --> 00:53:02,480
that you should leave me for so long|a period as half an hour.

967
00:53:03,880 --> 00:53:05,440
Couldn't you make it twenty minutes?

968
00:53:06,280 --> 00:53:07,559
I'll be back in no time.

969
00:53:34,000 --> 00:53:36,440
- Mr. Worthing.|- Good afternoon, Dr. Chasuble.

970
00:53:36,639 --> 00:53:39,360
I trust you'll excuse

971
00:53:39,559 --> 00:53:42,599
this relapse into the arms of Morpheus.

972
00:53:42,920 --> 00:53:44,800
In other words, 40 winks.

973
00:53:45,079 --> 00:53:47,960
Dr. Chasuble, I suppose you know|how to christen all right?

974
00:53:48,119 --> 00:53:50,760
I mean, of course, you are continually|christening, aren't you?

975
00:53:50,920 --> 00:53:54,280
It is, I regret to say, one of my|most constant duties in this parish.

976
00:53:54,920 --> 00:53:57,960
I have often spoken to the poorer|classes on the subject.

977
00:53:58,159 --> 00:54:00,199
- But they don't seem to know what thrift is.|- Well.

978
00:54:00,400 --> 00:54:02,519
But is there any particular infant

979
00:54:02,679 --> 00:54:04,400
in whom you are interested, Mr. Worthing?

980
00:54:04,760 --> 00:54:07,639
- Of course! Your brother.|- I beg your pardon?

981
00:54:07,840 --> 00:54:10,440
Your brother, I know, is unmarried, but...

982
00:54:10,679 --> 00:54:12,480
Dr. Chasuble, it is not for any child.

983
00:54:13,440 --> 00:54:16,400
The fact is, I was thinking|of getting christened myself.

984
00:54:16,559 --> 00:54:18,679
This afternoon, if you have nothing better to do.

985
00:54:18,840 --> 00:54:21,360
But surely, Mr. Worthing, you have|been christened already?

986
00:54:21,519 --> 00:54:22,920
I don't remember anything about it.

987
00:54:23,079 --> 00:54:24,559
But have you any grave doubts on the subject?

988
00:54:24,760 --> 00:54:26,159
I certainly intend to have.

989
00:54:26,440 --> 00:54:29,800
Unless, of course, you think|I'm a little too... old now.

990
00:54:30,199 --> 00:54:31,519
Not at all.

991
00:54:31,920 --> 00:54:34,719
The sprinkling, and, indeed, the immersion

992
00:54:34,880 --> 00:54:37,760
of adults is a perfectly canonical practice.

993
00:54:37,960 --> 00:54:39,000
Immersion!

994
00:54:39,159 --> 00:54:42,119
You need have no apprehensions.|Sprinkling is all that is necessary,

995
00:54:42,360 --> 00:54:45,400
or indeed I think advisable. Our weather

996
00:54:45,719 --> 00:54:47,360
is so changeable.

997
00:54:47,800 --> 00:54:49,840
At what hour would you like|the ceremony performed?

998
00:54:50,000 --> 00:54:53,039
Well, I thought I would trot round about|five, if that would suit you too?

999
00:54:53,199 --> 00:54:57,960
Perfectly, perfectly! In fact I have two|similar ceremonies to perform at that time.

1000
00:54:58,280 --> 00:54:59,760
A case of twins

1001
00:55:00,119 --> 00:55:04,159
that occurred recently in one of the|outlying cottages on your own estate.

1002
00:55:04,639 --> 00:55:06,920
Poor Jenkins the carter,

1003
00:55:07,239 --> 00:55:09,119
a most hard-working man.

1004
00:55:09,480 --> 00:55:12,679
Well, I don't see much fun in being|christened along with other babies.

1005
00:55:12,880 --> 00:55:15,599
It would be childish. Would half-past five do?

1006
00:55:15,840 --> 00:55:17,360
Admirably! Admirably!

1007
00:55:17,679 --> 00:55:20,800
- Till half-past five.|- Half-past five at the font.

1008
00:55:27,639 --> 00:55:28,440
Come in.

1009
00:55:30,000 --> 00:55:31,199
Dr. Chasuble?

1010
00:55:35,559 --> 00:55:38,519
What a perfect angel you are, Cecily.

1011
00:55:43,599 --> 00:55:45,239
And then is when he knelt.

1012
00:55:47,760 --> 00:55:50,800
Yes, I am sure that is how it was.

1013
00:55:51,000 --> 00:55:54,360
A Miss Fairfax has called to|see Mr. Worthing, Miss.

1014
00:55:54,679 --> 00:55:57,800
On very important business, Miss Fairfax states.

1015
00:55:57,960 --> 00:55:59,760
Isn't Mr. Worthing in the library?

1016
00:55:59,960 --> 00:56:03,639
Mr. Worthing went over in the direction|of the Rectory some time ago, Miss.

1017
00:56:04,440 --> 00:56:07,960
Pray ask the lady to come out here;|Mr. Worthing is sure to be back soon.

1018
00:56:08,159 --> 00:56:09,639
And, Merriman, you may bring tea.

1019
00:56:09,840 --> 00:56:10,960
Yes, Miss.

1020
00:56:13,079 --> 00:56:14,039
Oh, dear.

1021
00:56:14,960 --> 00:56:17,239
One of the many good elderly women

1022
00:56:17,400 --> 00:56:21,320
associated with Uncle Jack in some of his|philanthropic work in London, I suppose.

1023
00:56:21,559 --> 00:56:23,039
Miss Fairfax.

1024
00:56:35,960 --> 00:56:37,239
Miss Fairfax?

1025
00:56:39,039 --> 00:56:40,920
Pray let me introduce myself to you.

1026
00:56:41,159 --> 00:56:42,559
My name is Cecily Cardew.

1027
00:56:42,760 --> 00:56:44,480
What a very sweet name!

1028
00:56:44,880 --> 00:56:47,079
Something tells me that we are|going to be great friends.

1029
00:56:47,599 --> 00:56:49,719
I like you already more than I can say.

1030
00:56:50,320 --> 00:56:52,760
My first impressions of people are never wrong.

1031
00:56:53,280 --> 00:56:55,320
How nice of you to like me so much

1032
00:56:55,599 --> 00:56:59,639
after we have known one another|for such a comparatively short time.

1033
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:01,199
Shall we sit over there?

1034
00:57:01,360 --> 00:57:03,559
- I may call you Cecily, may I not?|- With pleasure.

1035
00:57:03,760 --> 00:57:06,639
And you will always call me Gwendolen, won't you?

1036
00:57:06,880 --> 00:57:07,840
If you wish.

1037
00:57:08,039 --> 00:57:10,639
Then that is all quite settled, is it not?

1038
00:57:11,400 --> 00:57:12,519
I hope so.

1039
00:57:17,360 --> 00:57:18,199
Cecily,

1040
00:57:19,199 --> 00:57:22,480
mamma, whose views on education|are remarkably strict,

1041
00:57:22,679 --> 00:57:25,280
has brought me up to be extremely short-sighted;

1042
00:57:25,880 --> 00:57:27,760
it is part of her system;

1043
00:57:28,880 --> 00:57:31,599
do you mind my looking at you through my glasses?

1044
00:57:32,760 --> 00:57:34,719
Oh! not at all, Gwendolen.

1045
00:57:34,880 --> 00:57:37,320
I am very fond of being looked at.

1046
00:57:50,440 --> 00:57:53,559
You are here on a short visit, I suppose.

1047
00:57:54,039 --> 00:57:56,320
- Oh no! I live here.|- Really?

1048
00:57:56,679 --> 00:57:58,159
Your mother, no doubt, or

1049
00:57:58,320 --> 00:58:01,840
some female relative of advanced|years, resides here also?

1050
00:58:02,519 --> 00:58:04,719
Oh no! I have no mother,

1051
00:58:04,960 --> 00:58:06,599
nor, in fact, any relations.

1052
00:58:06,760 --> 00:58:08,320
I am Mr. Worthing's ward.

1053
00:58:11,679 --> 00:58:14,519
It is strange he never mentioned to me|that he had a ward.

1054
00:58:15,159 --> 00:58:16,880
How secretive of him!

1055
00:58:17,199 --> 00:58:19,480
He grows more interesting hourly.

1056
00:58:20,920 --> 00:58:23,360
I am not sure, however, that the news

1057
00:58:23,559 --> 00:58:25,679
inspires me with feelings of unmixed delight.

1058
00:58:26,440 --> 00:58:29,400
In fact, if I may speak quite candidly,

1059
00:58:29,800 --> 00:58:31,000
Pray do!

1060
00:58:31,360 --> 00:58:33,159
I think that whenever one has anything

1061
00:58:33,400 --> 00:58:36,199
unpleasant to say, one should always|be quite candid.

1062
00:58:38,119 --> 00:58:41,400
Well, to speak with perfect candour, Cecily,

1063
00:58:42,360 --> 00:58:44,920
I wish that you were fully forty-two,

1064
00:58:45,199 --> 00:58:47,559
and more than usually plain for your age.

1065
00:58:48,440 --> 00:58:51,079
Ernest has a strong upright nature.

1066
00:58:51,800 --> 00:58:54,079
I beg your pardon, Gwendolen, did you say Ernest?

1067
00:58:54,320 --> 00:58:55,519
Yes.

1068
00:58:56,280 --> 00:58:59,480
Oh, but it is not Mr. Ernest Worthing|who is my guardian.

1069
00:58:59,679 --> 00:59:01,400
It is his brother, his elder brother.

1070
00:59:03,320 --> 00:59:05,280
Ernest never mentioned to me|that he had a brother.

1071
00:59:05,960 --> 00:59:09,239
I am sorry to say that they have not been|on good terms for a long time.

1072
00:59:10,559 --> 00:59:11,920
That accounts for it.

1073
00:59:13,199 --> 00:59:14,840
Of course you are quite,

1074
00:59:15,559 --> 00:59:19,000
quite sure that it is not Mr. Ernest|Worthing who is your guardian?

1075
00:59:20,280 --> 00:59:21,400
Quite sure.

1076
00:59:22,039 --> 00:59:23,159
In fact,

1077
00:59:24,000 --> 00:59:25,639
I am going to be his.

1078
00:59:27,039 --> 00:59:28,400
I beg your pardon?

1079
00:59:29,079 --> 00:59:33,119
Dearest Gwendolen, there is no reason why|I should make a secret of it to you.

1080
00:59:33,480 --> 00:59:36,199
Our little county newspaper is sure|to chronicle the fact next week.

1081
00:59:37,599 --> 00:59:40,400
Mr. Ernest Worthing and I

1082
00:59:40,559 --> 00:59:42,519
are engaged to be married.

1083
00:59:43,400 --> 00:59:45,440
My darling Cecily,

1084
00:59:45,800 --> 00:59:47,920
I think there must be some slight error.

1085
00:59:48,360 --> 00:59:50,800
Mr. Ernest Worthing is engaged to me.

1086
00:59:51,320 --> 00:59:55,159
The announcement will appear in the Morning|Post on Saturday at the latest.

1087
00:59:56,079 --> 00:59:59,440
I am afraid you must be under some misconception.

1088
01:00:00,119 --> 01:00:01,840
Ernest proposed to me

1089
01:00:02,480 --> 01:00:04,360
exactly ten minutes ago.

1090
01:00:05,960 --> 01:00:08,320
It is certainly very curious,

1091
01:00:08,840 --> 01:00:12,199
for he asked me to be his wife|yesterday afternoon at 5.30.

1092
01:00:12,480 --> 01:00:15,760
If you would care to verify the incident,|pray do so.

1093
01:00:16,239 --> 01:00:20,199
I never travel without my diary. One|should always have something sensational

1094
01:00:20,360 --> 01:00:21,920
to read in the train.

1095
01:00:22,840 --> 01:00:24,960
I am so sorry,

1096
01:00:25,119 --> 01:00:26,480
dearest Cecily,

1097
01:00:26,639 --> 01:00:28,760
if it is any disappointment to you,

1098
01:00:28,920 --> 01:00:31,280
but I am afraid I have the prior claim.

1099
01:00:32,000 --> 01:00:35,440
It would distress me more than I can|say, dearest Gwendolen,

1100
01:00:36,039 --> 01:00:39,159
if it caused you any mental or physical anguish,

1101
01:00:39,920 --> 01:00:43,440
but I feel bound to point out that|since Ernest proposed to you

1102
01:00:43,599 --> 01:00:45,639
he has clearly changed his mind.

1103
01:00:45,800 --> 01:00:49,880
If the poor fellow has been entrapped|into any foolish promise

1104
01:00:50,239 --> 01:00:53,119
I shall consider it my duty|to rescue him at once,

1105
01:00:53,639 --> 01:00:55,199
and with a firm hand.

1106
01:00:55,880 --> 01:00:58,519
Whatever unfortunate entanglement

1107
01:00:58,719 --> 01:01:01,480
my dear boy may have got himself into,

1108
01:01:01,800 --> 01:01:05,079
I will never reproach him with it|after we are married.

1109
01:01:06,000 --> 01:01:09,880
Do you allude to me, Miss Cardew,|as an entanglement?

1110
01:01:10,119 --> 01:01:11,519
You are presumptuous.

1111
01:01:12,000 --> 01:01:15,920
On an occasion of this kind it becomes more|than a moral duty to speak one's mind.

1112
01:01:16,079 --> 01:01:17,519
It becomes a pleasure.

1113
01:01:18,039 --> 01:01:21,800
Do you suggest, Miss Fairfax, that I|entrapped Ernest into an engagement?

1114
01:01:22,320 --> 01:01:23,880
How dare you?

1115
01:01:24,199 --> 01:01:27,000
This is no time for wearing the shallow|mask of manners.

1116
01:01:27,199 --> 01:01:30,320
When I see a spade I call it a spade.

1117
01:01:31,039 --> 01:01:33,800
I am glad to say I have never seen a spade.

1118
01:01:34,719 --> 01:01:37,480
It is obvious that our social spheres

1119
01:01:37,639 --> 01:01:38,960
have been widely different.

1120
01:01:40,639 --> 01:01:43,320
Shall I lay tea here as usual, Miss?

1121
01:01:44,039 --> 01:01:45,760
Yes, as usual.

1122
01:01:59,079 --> 01:02:01,039
Are there many interesting walks

1123
01:02:01,239 --> 01:02:03,440
- in the vicinity, Miss Cardew?|- Oh, yes.

1124
01:02:03,760 --> 01:02:08,039
A great many. From the top of one of the|hills quite close one can see five counties.

1125
01:02:08,679 --> 01:02:10,719
Five counties!

1126
01:02:11,440 --> 01:02:14,960
I don't think I should like that; I hate crowds.

1127
01:02:16,000 --> 01:02:16,960
I suppose

1128
01:02:17,119 --> 01:02:18,840
that is why you live in a town?

1129
01:02:21,760 --> 01:02:25,039
I had no idea there were any flowers|in the country.

1130
01:02:26,360 --> 01:02:30,639
Oh, flowers are as common here,|Miss Fairfax, as people are in London.

1131
01:02:32,000 --> 01:02:33,480
May I offer you some tea?

1132
01:02:34,199 --> 01:02:35,320
Thank you.

1133
01:02:37,079 --> 01:02:38,039
Sugar?

1134
01:02:38,920 --> 01:02:40,199
No, thank you.

1135
01:02:40,360 --> 01:02:43,800
Sugar is not fashionable any more.

1136
01:02:49,880 --> 01:02:50,920
Cake?

1137
01:02:51,360 --> 01:02:52,480
Or bread and butter?

1138
01:02:53,119 --> 01:02:55,239
Bread and butter, please.

1139
01:02:55,599 --> 01:02:58,559
Cake is rarely seen at the best houses nowadays.

1140
01:02:59,320 --> 01:03:02,000
Hand that to Miss Fairfax.

1141
01:03:13,039 --> 01:03:15,679
You have filled my tea with lumps of sugar,

1142
01:03:16,079 --> 01:03:20,599
and though I most distinctly asked for|bread and butter, you have given me cake.

1143
01:03:21,920 --> 01:03:25,039
I am known for the gentleness of my disposition,

1144
01:03:25,239 --> 01:03:27,679
and the extraordinary sweetness of my nature,

1145
01:03:27,840 --> 01:03:31,679
but I warn you, Miss Cardew, you may go too far.

1146
01:03:32,119 --> 01:03:35,320
To save my poor, innocent, trusting boy

1147
01:03:35,920 --> 01:03:38,440
from the machinations of any other girl

1148
01:03:38,599 --> 01:03:41,239
there are no lengths to which I would not go.

1149
01:03:41,400 --> 01:03:43,840
From the moment I saw you I distrusted you.

1150
01:03:44,039 --> 01:03:47,079
I felt that you were false and deceitful.|I am never deceived in such matters.

1151
01:03:47,440 --> 01:03:51,199
My first impressions of people are|invariably right.

1152
01:03:51,480 --> 01:03:54,519
It seems to me, Miss Fairfax, that I|am trespassing on your valuable time.

1153
01:03:55,239 --> 01:03:57,440
No doubt you have many other calls

1154
01:03:57,599 --> 01:03:59,960
of a similar character to make|in the neighbourhood.

1155
01:04:05,880 --> 01:04:06,920
Gwendolen!

1156
01:04:08,559 --> 01:04:10,679
My own Ernest!

1157
01:04:10,880 --> 01:04:12,280
Gwendolen! Darling!

1158
01:04:12,440 --> 01:04:13,480
A moment!

1159
01:04:13,639 --> 01:04:17,400
May I ask if you are engaged to be married|to this young lady?

1160
01:04:17,840 --> 01:04:21,960
To dear little Cecily! Good Heavens, no! What has|put such an idea into your pretty little head?

1161
01:04:22,159 --> 01:04:23,719
Thank you. You may!

1162
01:04:24,159 --> 01:04:26,880
I knew there must be some|misunderstanding, Miss Fairfax.

1163
01:04:27,039 --> 01:04:29,800
The gentleman whose arm is at present|round your waist

1164
01:04:29,960 --> 01:04:32,400
is my dear guardian, Mr. John Worthing.

1165
01:04:33,039 --> 01:04:34,320
I beg your pardon?

1166
01:04:34,639 --> 01:04:36,199
This is Uncle Jack.

1167
01:04:36,840 --> 01:04:38,559
Jack? Oh!

1168
01:04:39,679 --> 01:04:40,480
Cecily!

1169
01:04:40,960 --> 01:04:42,000
Here is Ernest.

1170
01:04:42,159 --> 01:04:43,719
My own love!

1171
01:04:45,039 --> 01:04:46,159
A moment!

1172
01:04:46,760 --> 01:04:49,719
Are you by any chance engaged|to be married to this young lady?

1173
01:04:49,880 --> 01:04:51,000
To what young lady?

1174
01:04:51,599 --> 01:04:53,960
- Good heavens! Gwendolen!|- Yes! To good heavens Gwendolen,

1175
01:04:54,119 --> 01:04:55,599
I mean, Gwendolen.

1176
01:04:55,920 --> 01:04:59,599
Of course not! What could have put such|an idea into your pretty little head?

1177
01:05:00,480 --> 01:05:03,199
Thank you... You may.

1178
01:05:03,360 --> 01:05:06,000
I felt there must be some slight error,|Miss Cardew.

1179
01:05:06,639 --> 01:05:10,239
The gentleman who is now embracing|you is my cousin,

1180
01:05:10,400 --> 01:05:12,039
Mr. Algernon Moncrieff.

1181
01:05:13,079 --> 01:05:14,639
Algernon Moncrieff?

1182
01:05:16,719 --> 01:05:18,679
Are you called Algernon?

1183
01:05:19,559 --> 01:05:20,760
I cannot deny it.

1184
01:05:24,400 --> 01:05:26,360
Is your name really John?

1185
01:05:26,800 --> 01:05:28,360
Well, I could deny it if I liked.

1186
01:05:28,519 --> 01:05:31,639
I could deny anything if I liked. But|my name certainly is John.

1187
01:05:32,800 --> 01:05:35,320
A gross deception has been practised|on both of us.

1188
01:05:35,599 --> 01:05:37,719
My poor wounded Cecily!

1189
01:05:38,079 --> 01:05:40,440
My sweet wronged Gwendolen!

1190
01:05:40,639 --> 01:05:41,920
You will call me sister,

1191
01:05:42,360 --> 01:05:43,480
will you not?

1192
01:05:47,480 --> 01:05:50,360
There is just one question I would like|to be allowed to ask my guardian.

1193
01:05:50,519 --> 01:05:51,639
An admirable idea!

1194
01:05:51,800 --> 01:05:55,239
Mr. Worthing, there is just one question|I would like to be permitted to put to you.

1195
01:05:55,480 --> 01:05:57,519
Where is your brother Ernest?

1196
01:05:57,760 --> 01:06:00,360
We are both engaged to be married to|your brother Ernest,

1197
01:06:00,519 --> 01:06:02,960
so it is a matter of some importance|to us to know

1198
01:06:03,159 --> 01:06:05,280
where your brother Ernest is

1199
01:06:06,039 --> 01:06:08,880
- at present.|- Gwendolen and Cecily.

1200
01:06:09,079 --> 01:06:10,880
I will tell you quite frankly

1201
01:06:11,519 --> 01:06:14,719
that I have no brother Ernest.|I have no brother at all.

1202
01:06:14,840 --> 01:06:16,360
No brother at all?

1203
01:06:17,000 --> 01:06:18,039
None!

1204
01:06:18,519 --> 01:06:20,960
Have you never had a brother of any kind?

1205
01:06:21,320 --> 01:06:23,199
Never. Not even of any kind.

1206
01:06:23,960 --> 01:06:26,239
I am afraid it is quite clear, Cecily,

1207
01:06:26,519 --> 01:06:29,360
that neither of us is engaged|to be married to any one.

1208
01:06:30,519 --> 01:06:34,039
It is not a very pleasant position|for a young girl

1209
01:06:34,239 --> 01:06:36,519
suddenly to find herself in. Is it?

1210
01:06:37,320 --> 01:06:38,800
Let us go into the house.

1211
01:06:39,119 --> 01:06:41,800
They will hardly venture to come after us there.

1212
01:06:41,960 --> 01:06:43,000
No.

1213
01:06:43,159 --> 01:06:45,840
Men are such cowards, aren't they?

1214
01:06:54,519 --> 01:06:58,280
This ghastly state of things is what|you would call Bunburying, I suppose?

1215
01:06:58,480 --> 01:07:01,199
Yes, the most wonderful Bunbury|I have ever had in my life.

1216
01:07:01,400 --> 01:07:04,840
Well, the only small satisfaction I get|out of the whole of this wretched business

1217
01:07:05,000 --> 01:07:07,880
is that your friend Bunbury, dear Algy,|is quite exploded.

1218
01:07:08,119 --> 01:07:09,679
And a very good thing too.

1219
01:07:09,840 --> 01:07:14,039
Your brother is a little off colour, isn't he,|dear Jack? And not a bad thing either.

1220
01:07:14,280 --> 01:07:18,159
As for your deceiving a sweet, simple,|innocent girl like Miss Cardew, I can only say...

1221
01:07:18,519 --> 01:07:21,639
it's inexcusable. To say nothing of|the fact that she is my ward.

1222
01:07:21,800 --> 01:07:24,320
I can see no possible defence at all|for your deceiving a clever,

1223
01:07:24,480 --> 01:07:28,000
experienced young lady like Miss Fairfax. To|say nothing of the fact that she is my cousin.

1224
01:07:28,159 --> 01:07:31,840
I simply wanted to be engaged to|Gwendolen, that is all. I love her.

1225
01:07:32,000 --> 01:07:34,960
Well, I simply wanted to be engaged|to Cecily. I adore her.

1226
01:07:35,199 --> 01:07:37,320
There is certainly no chance of your|marrying Miss Cardew.

1227
01:07:37,519 --> 01:07:40,320
I don't think there is much likelihood, Jack,|of you and Miss Fairfax being united.

1228
01:07:43,119 --> 01:07:44,079
Guard!

1229
01:07:45,360 --> 01:07:47,639
Will you be good enough to inform me

1230
01:07:47,920 --> 01:07:49,440
how soon this

1231
01:07:49,719 --> 01:07:52,599
railway train arrives at Woolton?

1232
01:07:52,920 --> 01:07:54,480
Now, let me see...

1233
01:07:55,239 --> 01:07:58,599
There's Gotherington... No, we've passed it.

1234
01:07:59,119 --> 01:08:01,400
And there's Goostrey Halt,

1235
01:08:01,599 --> 01:08:02,639
Sopley,

1236
01:08:03,039 --> 01:08:04,679
Cobbler's Corner,

1237
01:08:05,079 --> 01:08:06,639
Combe Brissett,

1238
01:08:07,119 --> 01:08:08,320
High Totten,

1239
01:08:08,519 --> 01:08:10,559
Low Totten, Little...

1240
01:08:10,760 --> 01:08:13,039
How you can sit there, calmly eating muffins

1241
01:08:13,239 --> 01:08:16,680
when we are in this horrible trouble, I can't|imagine. You seem to be perfectly heartless.

1242
01:08:16,920 --> 01:08:19,119
Well, I can't eat muffins in an agitated manner.

1243
01:08:19,479 --> 01:08:21,439
The butter would probably get on my cuffs.

1244
01:08:21,640 --> 01:08:24,680
One should always eat muffins quite calmly.|It is the only way to eat them.

1245
01:08:24,840 --> 01:08:27,359
I say it's perfectly heartless to be|eating them at all.

1246
01:08:28,319 --> 01:08:31,359
When I am in trouble, eating is the only|thing that consoles me.

1247
01:08:38,079 --> 01:08:39,199
They are eating muffins!

1248
01:08:39,439 --> 01:08:41,479
Algy, I wish to goodness you would go.

1249
01:08:41,760 --> 01:08:45,439
But I've just made arrangements with Dr. Chasuble|to be christened at 6:00 under the name of Ernest.

1250
01:08:45,640 --> 01:08:50,840
I made arrangements myself to be christened at|5.30 and I naturally will take the name of Ernest.

1251
01:08:51,119 --> 01:08:54,880
I have a perfect right to be christened. There is|no evidence that I was ever christened by anyone.

1252
01:08:55,119 --> 01:08:57,319
It is entirely different with you.|You have been christened already.

1253
01:08:57,479 --> 01:08:58,960
Yes, but I have not been christened for years.

1254
01:08:59,159 --> 01:09:01,800
Yes, but you have been christened.|That is the important thing.

1255
01:09:02,079 --> 01:09:04,600
Quite so. So I know my constitution can stand it.

1256
01:09:04,840 --> 01:09:06,800
It might make you very unwell.

1257
01:09:07,199 --> 01:09:10,159
You can hardly have forgotten that some one very|closely connected with you was nearly carried off

1258
01:09:10,319 --> 01:09:14,279
- in Paris this week by a severe chill.|- You talk as if a severe chill were hereditary.

1259
01:09:14,800 --> 01:09:16,840
It usen't to be, I know, but it may be now.

1260
01:09:17,039 --> 01:09:19,239
Science is always making wonderful|improvements in things.

1261
01:09:24,880 --> 01:09:26,199
They're looking this way.

1262
01:09:26,399 --> 01:09:27,880
What effrontery!

1263
01:09:28,720 --> 01:09:30,039
They're approaching.

1264
01:09:30,199 --> 01:09:31,680
That's very forward of them.

1265
01:09:31,840 --> 01:09:35,800
Let us preserve a dignified silence.

1266
01:09:36,000 --> 01:09:38,800
Certainly. It is the only thing to do now.

1267
01:10:00,680 --> 01:10:01,800
Mr. Worthing,

1268
01:10:02,640 --> 01:10:05,000
I have something very particular to ask you.

1269
01:10:05,319 --> 01:10:07,039
Much depends on your reply.

1270
01:10:07,239 --> 01:10:09,279
Your common sense is invaluable, Gwendolen.

1271
01:10:09,439 --> 01:10:12,640
Mr. Moncrieff, kindly answer me|the following question.

1272
01:10:12,840 --> 01:10:15,720
Why did you pretend to be my guardian's brother?

1273
01:10:16,279 --> 01:10:18,720
In order that I might have an|opportunity of meeting you.

1274
01:10:20,439 --> 01:10:23,399
That certainly seems a satisfactory|explanation, does it not?

1275
01:10:23,600 --> 01:10:25,319
Yes, dear, if you can believe him.

1276
01:10:25,680 --> 01:10:28,800
Mr. Worthing, what explanation|can you offer me

1277
01:10:28,880 --> 01:10:30,760
for pretending to have a brother?

1278
01:10:31,439 --> 01:10:34,399
Was it in order that you might have|an opportunity of coming up to town

1279
01:10:34,560 --> 01:10:36,039
to see me as often as possible?

1280
01:10:37,359 --> 01:10:38,640
Can you doubt it, Miss Fairfax?

1281
01:10:39,880 --> 01:10:42,439
I have the gravest doubts on the subject.

1282
01:10:42,600 --> 01:10:44,560
But I intend to crush them.

1283
01:10:45,840 --> 01:10:49,039
Their explanations appear to have|the stamp of truth upon them.

1284
01:10:50,239 --> 01:10:51,800
Especially Mr. Worthing's.

1285
01:10:52,159 --> 01:10:54,600
I am more than content with|what Mr. Moncrieff has said.

1286
01:10:55,880 --> 01:10:59,479
His voice alone inspires one|with absolute credulity.

1287
01:10:59,640 --> 01:11:01,760
Then you think we should forgive them?

1288
01:11:02,880 --> 01:11:03,840
Yes.

1289
01:11:05,039 --> 01:11:06,239
I mean no.

1290
01:11:06,600 --> 01:11:08,239
True! I had forgotten.

1291
01:11:08,640 --> 01:11:11,600
There are principles at stake that|one cannot surrender.

1292
01:11:12,640 --> 01:11:15,600
Which of us should tell them?|The task is not a pleasant one.

1293
01:11:15,920 --> 01:11:18,640
- Could we not both speak at the same time?|- An excellent idea!

1294
01:11:18,840 --> 01:11:21,439
I nearly always speak at the same|time as other people.

1295
01:11:21,600 --> 01:11:23,119
Will you take the time from me?

1296
01:11:24,479 --> 01:11:28,520
Your Christian names are still an|insuperable barrier. That is all!

1297
01:11:29,640 --> 01:11:31,600
Our Christian names! Is that all?

1298
01:11:31,760 --> 01:11:33,479
But we are going to be christened|this afternoon.

1299
01:11:34,560 --> 01:11:37,520
For my sake you are prepared|to do this terrible thing?

1300
01:11:38,800 --> 01:11:39,760
I am.

1301
01:11:40,560 --> 01:11:44,159
To please me you are ready to|face this fearful ordeal?

1302
01:11:44,840 --> 01:11:45,800
I am.

1303
01:11:46,239 --> 01:11:49,439
How absurd to talk of the equality of the sexes!

1304
01:11:49,840 --> 01:11:52,640
Where questions of self-sacrifice are|concerned,

1305
01:11:53,119 --> 01:11:55,239
men are infinitely beyond us.

1306
01:11:56,640 --> 01:11:57,600
We are.

1307
01:12:00,439 --> 01:12:01,479
- Darling!|- Darling!

1308
01:12:05,720 --> 01:12:06,680
Gwendolen!

1309
01:12:08,720 --> 01:12:09,840
What does this mean?

1310
01:12:10,279 --> 01:12:12,720
Merely that I am engaged to Mr. Worthing, mamma.

1311
01:12:14,600 --> 01:12:15,880
Come here.

1312
01:12:16,880 --> 01:12:18,000
Sit down.

1313
01:12:19,199 --> 01:12:20,520
Sit down immediately.

1314
01:12:24,239 --> 01:12:26,279
Mr. Worthing, you will clearly understand

1315
01:12:26,479 --> 01:12:30,359
that all communication between|yourself and my daughter

1316
01:12:30,840 --> 01:12:33,880
must cease immediately from this moment.

1317
01:12:34,079 --> 01:12:37,439
On this, as indeed on all points, I am firm.

1318
01:12:38,119 --> 01:12:40,479
I am engaged to be married|to Gwendolen, Lady Bracknell!

1319
01:12:41,560 --> 01:12:43,680
You are nothing of the kind, sir.

1320
01:12:45,359 --> 01:12:47,920
And now, as regards Algernon!

1321
01:12:48,079 --> 01:12:49,279
Algernon!

1322
01:12:49,760 --> 01:12:50,680
Yes, Aunt Augusta.

1323
01:12:51,399 --> 01:12:54,000
May I ask if it is in this house

1324
01:12:54,159 --> 01:12:57,359
that your invalid friend Mr. Bunbury resides?

1325
01:12:57,960 --> 01:13:00,079
Oh! No! Bunbury doesn't live here.

1326
01:13:00,279 --> 01:13:02,239
Bunbury is somewhere else at present.

1327
01:13:02,479 --> 01:13:03,600
In fact, Bunbury is dead,

1328
01:13:04,800 --> 01:13:06,000
Dead!

1329
01:13:06,359 --> 01:13:07,840
When did Mr. Bunbury die?

1330
01:13:08,399 --> 01:13:10,520
Oh! I killed Bunbury this afternoon.

1331
01:13:10,760 --> 01:13:12,159
I mean Bunbury died this afternoon.

1332
01:13:13,239 --> 01:13:14,800
What did he die of?

1333
01:13:14,960 --> 01:13:16,079
Bunbury?

1334
01:13:16,479 --> 01:13:17,600
Oh, he was quite exploded.

1335
01:13:18,439 --> 01:13:19,840
Exploded!

1336
01:13:20,039 --> 01:13:23,239
Was he a victim of a revolutionary outrage?

1337
01:13:23,680 --> 01:13:26,319
My dear Aunt Augusta, I mean he was found out!

1338
01:13:26,640 --> 01:13:29,840
The doctors found out that Bunbury|could not live, that is what I mean,

1339
01:13:30,079 --> 01:13:31,560
so, Bunbury died.

1340
01:13:33,079 --> 01:13:36,279
And now that we have finally got|rid of this Mr. Bunbury,

1341
01:13:37,319 --> 01:13:39,039
may I ask, Mr. Worthing,

1342
01:13:39,239 --> 01:13:40,800
who is that young person

1343
01:13:40,960 --> 01:13:43,600
whose hand my nephew Algernon is holding

1344
01:13:43,880 --> 01:13:47,000
in what appears to me to be a|peculiarly unnecessary manner?

1345
01:13:47,199 --> 01:13:50,960
That lady is Miss Cecily Cardew, my ward.

1346
01:13:51,800 --> 01:13:54,079
I am engaged to be married to Cecily,|Aunt Augusta.

1347
01:13:54,600 --> 01:13:55,720
I beg your pardon?

1348
01:13:56,600 --> 01:13:58,560
Mr. Moncrieff and I

1349
01:13:58,720 --> 01:14:01,079
are engaged to be married, Lady Bracknell.

1350
01:14:01,279 --> 01:14:02,239
Indeed!

1351
01:14:02,439 --> 01:14:06,720
I think some preliminary inquiry on my|part would not be out of place.

1352
01:14:07,600 --> 01:14:08,800
Mr. Worthing,

1353
01:14:09,600 --> 01:14:12,039
is Miss Cardew at all connected

1354
01:14:12,239 --> 01:14:15,600
with any of the larger railway|stations in London?

1355
01:14:16,159 --> 01:14:18,359
I merely require information.

1356
01:14:18,680 --> 01:14:21,359
Until yesterday I had no idea

1357
01:14:21,520 --> 01:14:22,920
that there were any families

1358
01:14:23,079 --> 01:14:26,119
or persons whose origin was a Terminus.

1359
01:14:27,439 --> 01:14:30,159
Miss Cardew is the grand-daughter|of the late Mr. Thomas Cardew

1360
01:14:30,319 --> 01:14:33,359
of 149 Belgrave Square, South West;

1361
01:14:33,520 --> 01:14:36,960
Gervase Park, Dorking, Surrey; and the Sporran,

1362
01:14:37,520 --> 01:14:40,479
- Fifeshire.|- That sounds not unsatisfactory.

1363
01:14:41,000 --> 01:14:43,439
Three addresses always inspire confidence,

1364
01:14:43,600 --> 01:14:45,399
even in tradesmen.

1365
01:14:45,600 --> 01:14:48,560
But what proof have I of their authenticity?

1366
01:14:49,399 --> 01:14:52,600
I have carefully preserved the Court Guides|of the period. They are open to your

1367
01:14:52,760 --> 01:14:53,800
inspection, Lady Bracknell.

1368
01:14:54,000 --> 01:14:58,039
I have known strange errors in that publication.

1369
01:14:58,399 --> 01:15:02,560
Miss Cardew's family solicitors are Messrs.|Markby, Markby, and Markby.

1370
01:15:03,199 --> 01:15:05,479
Markby, Markby, and Markby?

1371
01:15:05,640 --> 01:15:08,479
A firm of the very highest position|in their profession.

1372
01:15:09,000 --> 01:15:10,880
I have also in my possession,|you will be pleased to hear,

1373
01:15:11,079 --> 01:15:13,800
certificates of Miss Cardew's birth,|baptism, whooping cough,

1374
01:15:14,159 --> 01:15:16,960
registration, vaccination, confirmation,

1375
01:15:17,840 --> 01:15:20,319
and the measles; the German|and the English variety.

1376
01:15:20,840 --> 01:15:23,279
A life crowded with incident, I see;

1377
01:15:23,680 --> 01:15:25,880
but somewhat too exciting for a young girl.

1378
01:15:26,359 --> 01:15:27,840
Gwendolen,

1379
01:15:28,039 --> 01:15:30,319
the time approaches for our departure.

1380
01:15:30,479 --> 01:15:32,279
We have not a moment to lose.

1381
01:15:33,960 --> 01:15:36,520
As a matter of form, Mr. Worthing,

1382
01:15:36,680 --> 01:15:40,199
I had better ask if Miss Cardew|has any little fortune?

1383
01:15:42,439 --> 01:15:47,119
Only about one hundred and thirty|thousand pounds in the Funds. That is all.

1384
01:15:47,600 --> 01:15:50,239
Goodbye, Lady Bracknell.|So pleased to have seen you.

1385
01:15:50,600 --> 01:15:52,640
One moment, Mr. Worthing.

1386
01:15:53,640 --> 01:15:56,840
A hundred and thirty thousand|pounds! And in the Funds!

1387
01:15:57,880 --> 01:16:01,640
Miss Cardew seems a most attractive|young lady, now that I look at her.

1388
01:16:02,560 --> 01:16:06,920
Few girls of the present day|have any really solid qualities,

1389
01:16:07,359 --> 01:16:10,119
qualities that last, and improve with time.

1390
01:16:10,520 --> 01:16:12,640
We live, I regret to say,

1391
01:16:12,800 --> 01:16:14,760
in an age of surfaces.

1392
01:16:15,439 --> 01:16:16,760
Come over here, dear.

1393
01:16:20,439 --> 01:16:21,640
Pretty child!

1394
01:16:21,920 --> 01:16:23,560
Your dress is sadly simple

1395
01:16:23,720 --> 01:16:26,760
and your hair seems almost as|Nature might have left it.

1396
01:16:26,960 --> 01:16:28,520
But we can soon alter all that.

1397
01:16:28,680 --> 01:16:30,880
A thoroughly experienced French maid

1398
01:16:31,119 --> 01:16:34,439
produces a really remarkable result|in a very brief space of time.

1399
01:16:35,239 --> 01:16:38,359
There are distinct social possibilities|in your profile.

1400
01:16:38,560 --> 01:16:40,439
Cecily is the dearest, sweetest,

1401
01:16:40,600 --> 01:16:42,159
prettiest girl in the world.

1402
01:16:42,399 --> 01:16:44,840
And I don't care twopence|her social possibilities.

1403
01:16:45,159 --> 01:16:47,960
Never speak disrespectfully of Society, Algernon.

1404
01:16:48,239 --> 01:16:50,520
Only people who can't get into it do that.

1405
01:16:51,159 --> 01:16:55,239
I suppose you know that Algernon has|nothing but his debts to depend upon.

1406
01:16:55,600 --> 01:16:58,640
But I do not approve of mercenary marriages.

1407
01:16:58,880 --> 01:17:02,399
When I married Lord Bracknell|I had no fortune of any kind.

1408
01:17:02,560 --> 01:17:05,600
But I never dreamed of allowing that|to stand in my way.

1409
01:17:06,119 --> 01:17:09,399
Well, I suppose I must give my consent.

1410
01:17:10,680 --> 01:17:12,159
Thank you, Aunt Augusta.

1411
01:17:12,319 --> 01:17:14,039
Cecily, you may kiss me!

1412
01:17:14,479 --> 01:17:16,199
Thank you, Lady Bracknell.

1413
01:17:16,560 --> 01:17:19,439
You may also address me as Aunt|Augusta for the future.

1414
01:17:19,720 --> 01:17:21,279
Thank you, Aunt Augusta.

1415
01:17:21,640 --> 01:17:24,319
The marriage, I think, had better|take place quite soon.

1416
01:17:24,520 --> 01:17:26,319
Thank you, Aunt Augusta.

1417
01:17:27,000 --> 01:17:28,640
To speak frankly,

1418
01:17:29,000 --> 01:17:31,600
I am not in favour of long engagements.

1419
01:17:31,960 --> 01:17:36,239
They give people an opportunity of finding|out each other's characters before marriage,

1420
01:17:36,399 --> 01:17:37,960
which I think is never advisable.

1421
01:17:38,119 --> 01:17:40,760
I beg your pardon for interrupting|you, Lady Bracknell,

1422
01:17:40,920 --> 01:17:43,279
but this engagement is quite out of the question.

1423
01:17:43,600 --> 01:17:47,560
I am Miss Cardew's guardian, and she cannot marry|without my consent until she comes of age.

1424
01:17:47,720 --> 01:17:50,600
That consent I absolutely decline to give.

1425
01:17:50,800 --> 01:17:52,760
Upon what grounds may I ask?

1426
01:17:52,960 --> 01:17:55,079
Algernon is an extremely,

1427
01:17:55,279 --> 01:17:58,800
I may almost say ostentatiously,|eligible young man.

1428
01:17:59,319 --> 01:18:02,760
He has nothing, and looks everything.|What more can one desire?

1429
01:18:03,319 --> 01:18:06,359
It pains me very much to have to speak frankly|to you, Lady Bracknell, about your nephew,

1430
01:18:06,560 --> 01:18:09,680
but the fact is that I do not approve|at all of his moral character.

1431
01:18:09,840 --> 01:18:11,279
I suspect him of being untruthful.

1432
01:18:11,840 --> 01:18:12,880
Untruthful!

1433
01:18:13,319 --> 01:18:15,520
My nephew Algernon untruthful?

1434
01:18:16,000 --> 01:18:18,119
Impossible! He was at Oxford.

1435
01:18:20,640 --> 01:18:23,159
I fear there can be no possible doubt|about the matter.

1436
01:18:23,520 --> 01:18:27,800
This afternoon during my temporary absence|in London on an important question of

1437
01:18:28,760 --> 01:18:29,560
romance,

1438
01:18:29,960 --> 01:18:34,319
he obtained admission to my house by means|of the false pretence of being my brother.

1439
01:18:35,000 --> 01:18:36,720
Under an assumed name he drank,

1440
01:18:36,920 --> 01:18:41,840
I've just been informed by my butler, an entire|pint bottle of Perrier-Jouet, Brut, '89;

1441
01:18:42,119 --> 01:18:44,319
a wine I was specially reserving for myself.

1442
01:18:44,520 --> 01:18:48,199
Continuing his disgraceful deception, he|succeeded during the course of the afternoon

1443
01:18:48,399 --> 01:18:51,159
in alienating the affections of my only ward.

1444
01:18:51,359 --> 01:18:54,560
He subsequently stayed to tea,|and devoured every single muffin.

1445
01:18:54,800 --> 01:18:58,920
What makes his conduct more heartless is that he|was aware from the first that I have no brother,

1446
01:18:59,159 --> 01:19:00,640
that I never had a brother,

1447
01:19:00,840 --> 01:19:03,439
and that I don't intend to have a|brother, not even of any kind.

1448
01:19:08,239 --> 01:19:12,119
Mr. Worthing, after careful consideration

1449
01:19:12,640 --> 01:19:15,319
I have decided entirely to overlook

1450
01:19:15,479 --> 01:19:17,039
my nephew's conduct towards you.

1451
01:19:17,199 --> 01:19:19,560
That is very generous of you, Lady Bracknell.

1452
01:19:19,760 --> 01:19:22,039
My own decision, however, is unalterable.

1453
01:19:22,239 --> 01:19:23,960
I decline to give my consent.

1454
01:19:25,760 --> 01:19:27,319
Come here, sweet child.

1455
01:19:30,159 --> 01:19:31,560
How old are you?

1456
01:19:32,239 --> 01:19:34,800
Well, I am really only eighteen, but I always

1457
01:19:34,960 --> 01:19:36,760
admit to twenty when I go to evening parties.

1458
01:19:36,920 --> 01:19:39,720
You are perfectly right in making|some slight alteration.

1459
01:19:40,159 --> 01:19:43,279
A woman should never be really|accurate about her age.

1460
01:19:43,479 --> 01:19:45,279
It looks so calculating.

1461
01:19:45,880 --> 01:19:49,239
Eighteen, admitting to twenty at evening parties.

1462
01:19:49,399 --> 01:19:53,920
Well, you will soon be of age and free|from the restraints of tutelage.

1463
01:19:54,199 --> 01:19:58,079
So that I do not think your guardian's|consent is a matter of any importance.

1464
01:19:58,319 --> 01:20:01,680
Pray excuse me for interrupting you once again,|Lady Bracknell, but I think it is only fair

1465
01:20:01,880 --> 01:20:04,319
to point out that under to the terms|of her grandfather's will

1466
01:20:04,479 --> 01:20:07,760
Miss Cardew does not legally come of|age until she is

1467
01:20:07,920 --> 01:20:09,439
thirty-five.

1468
01:20:09,920 --> 01:20:12,720
That does not seem to me to be a|very grave objection.

1469
01:20:13,239 --> 01:20:15,520
Thirty-five is a very attractive age.

1470
01:20:16,199 --> 01:20:19,399
London society is full of women|of the highest birth

1471
01:20:19,720 --> 01:20:22,920
who, of their own free choice, have|remained thirty-five for years.

1472
01:20:23,399 --> 01:20:25,119
Lady Dumbleton is an instance in point.

1473
01:20:25,840 --> 01:20:29,880
To my own knowledge she has been thirty-five|ever since she arrived at the age of forty,

1474
01:20:30,199 --> 01:20:32,000
which was many years ago now.

1475
01:20:32,279 --> 01:20:35,000
I see no reason why our dear Cecily

1476
01:20:35,159 --> 01:20:38,159
should not be even more attractive|at the age you mention

1477
01:20:38,279 --> 01:20:39,800
than she is at present.

1478
01:20:40,079 --> 01:20:42,880
There will be a large accumulation of property.

1479
01:20:44,199 --> 01:20:45,319
Algy,

1480
01:20:46,279 --> 01:20:48,640
could you wait for me till I was thirty-five?

1481
01:20:49,680 --> 01:20:51,960
Of course I could, Cecily. You know I could.

1482
01:20:52,600 --> 01:20:55,399
Yes, I felt that instinctively.

1483
01:20:56,640 --> 01:20:58,279
But I couldn't wait all that time.

1484
01:20:58,479 --> 01:21:00,600
- But Cecily!|- My dear Mr. Worthing,

1485
01:21:00,920 --> 01:21:05,520
as Miss Cardew states positively that she|cannot wait until she is thirty-five,

1486
01:21:05,960 --> 01:21:10,159
a remark which I am bound to say seems to|me to show a somewhat impatient nature,

1487
01:21:10,640 --> 01:21:12,840
I would beg of you to reconsider your decision.

1488
01:21:13,039 --> 01:21:17,079
But my dear Lady Bracknell, the matter is|entirely in your own hands.

1489
01:21:17,680 --> 01:21:19,720
The moment you consent to my marriage|with Gwendolen,

1490
01:21:19,920 --> 01:21:23,600
I will most gladly allow your nephew to|form an alliance with my ward.

1491
01:21:24,279 --> 01:21:26,920
That is not the destiny I propose for Gwendolen.

1492
01:21:27,079 --> 01:21:29,439
Algernon, of course, can choose for himself.

1493
01:21:29,880 --> 01:21:33,399
Come, dear. We have already missed five,|if not six, trains.

1494
01:21:34,000 --> 01:21:37,279
To miss any more might expose us to|comment on the platform.

1495
01:21:39,359 --> 01:21:41,399
Everything is quite ready for the christenings.

1496
01:21:42,920 --> 01:21:44,399
The christenings, sir!

1497
01:21:45,159 --> 01:21:46,960
Is not that somewhat premature?

1498
01:21:47,479 --> 01:21:51,439
Both these gentlemen have expressed|a desire for immediate baptism.

1499
01:21:51,960 --> 01:21:53,520
At their age?

1500
01:21:53,800 --> 01:21:56,319
The idea is grotesque and irreligious!

1501
01:21:56,520 --> 01:22:01,119
Algernon, I forbid you to be baptized.|I will not hear of such excesses.

1502
01:22:02,439 --> 01:22:04,000
Am I to understand

1503
01:22:04,199 --> 01:22:06,920
that there be no christenings|at all this afternoon?

1504
01:22:07,439 --> 01:22:10,319
I don't think that, with things as they|are, Dr. Chasuble,

1505
01:22:10,479 --> 01:22:13,600
they would be of much practical value|to either of us.

1506
01:22:13,840 --> 01:22:17,119
As your present mood seems to be|one peculiarly secular,

1507
01:22:17,279 --> 01:22:19,159
I will return to the church at once.

1508
01:22:19,439 --> 01:22:20,640
Indeed, I have just been informed

1509
01:22:21,159 --> 01:22:24,039
- Miss Prism has been waiting for me.|- Miss Prism!

1510
01:22:25,640 --> 01:22:28,920
Did I hear you mention a Miss Prism?

1511
01:22:29,279 --> 01:22:32,119
Yes, indeed. I am on my way to join her.

1512
01:22:32,279 --> 01:22:34,479
Kindly allow me to detain you for one moment.

1513
01:22:35,319 --> 01:22:39,600
Is this Miss Prism a female of repellent aspect,

1514
01:22:39,800 --> 01:22:42,159
remotely connected with education?

1515
01:22:42,760 --> 01:22:46,960
She is the most cultivated of ladies, and|the very picture of respectability.

1516
01:22:47,159 --> 01:22:49,439
It is obviously the same person.

1517
01:22:50,239 --> 01:22:54,159
May I ask what is her position in your household?

1518
01:22:55,640 --> 01:22:58,560
Miss Prism, Lady Bracknell, has for the |last three years been Miss Cardew's

1519
01:22:58,760 --> 01:23:01,399
esteemed governess and valued companion.

1520
01:23:01,560 --> 01:23:04,600
In spite of what I hear of her, I must|see her at once.

1521
01:23:04,800 --> 01:23:06,000
Let her be sent for.

1522
01:23:06,560 --> 01:23:07,680
She approaches;

1523
01:23:07,880 --> 01:23:09,439
she is nigh.

1524
01:23:10,319 --> 01:23:13,119
I was told you expected me in the|vestry, dear Canon.

1525
01:23:13,279 --> 01:23:16,399
I have been waiting for you there for|an hour and three-quarters.

1526
01:23:16,600 --> 01:23:17,720
Prism!

1527
01:23:21,680 --> 01:23:22,960
Come here, Prism!

1528
01:23:28,239 --> 01:23:30,880
Prism! Where is that baby?

1529
01:23:33,840 --> 01:23:36,359
Twenty-eight years ago, Prism,

1530
01:23:36,520 --> 01:23:38,039
you left Lord Bracknell's house,

1531
01:23:38,600 --> 01:23:42,640
in charge of a perambulator containing|an infant of the male sex.

1532
01:23:43,239 --> 01:23:44,560
You never returned.

1533
01:23:45,439 --> 01:23:46,720
Some few weeks later

1534
01:23:46,880 --> 01:23:49,840
the perambulator was discovered at midnight,

1535
01:23:50,359 --> 01:23:52,159
standing by itself

1536
01:23:52,359 --> 01:23:54,960
in a remote corner of Bayswater.

1537
01:23:55,760 --> 01:23:57,960
It contained the manuscript of a

1538
01:23:58,119 --> 01:24:01,640
three-volume novel of more than usually revolting

1539
01:24:01,800 --> 01:24:03,680
sentimentality.

1540
01:24:03,840 --> 01:24:06,039
But the baby was not there!

1541
01:24:06,840 --> 01:24:09,640
Prism! Where is that baby?

1542
01:24:11,640 --> 01:24:14,399
Where is that baby, Prism?

1543
01:24:17,119 --> 01:24:18,439
Lady Bracknell,

1544
01:24:19,600 --> 01:24:22,479
I admit with shame that I do not know.

1545
01:24:22,960 --> 01:24:24,680
I only wish I did.

1546
01:24:25,800 --> 01:24:28,359
The plain facts of the case are these.

1547
01:24:29,279 --> 01:24:31,159
On the morning of the day you mention,

1548
01:24:31,319 --> 01:24:33,880
a day that is for ever branded on my memory,

1549
01:24:34,359 --> 01:24:37,960
I prepared as usual to take the baby|out in its perambulator.

1550
01:24:38,479 --> 01:24:40,119
I had also with me

1551
01:24:40,319 --> 01:24:43,199
a somewhat old, but capacious hand-bag

1552
01:24:43,800 --> 01:24:46,479
in which I had intended to place|the manuscript of a work

1553
01:24:46,640 --> 01:24:50,000
of fiction that I had written|during my few unoccupied hours.

1554
01:24:50,800 --> 01:24:54,399
In a moment of mental abstraction, for|which I never can forgive myself,

1555
01:24:55,199 --> 01:24:57,840
I deposited the manuscript in the bassinette,

1556
01:24:58,319 --> 01:25:00,760
and placed the baby in the hand-bag.

1557
01:25:01,079 --> 01:25:04,119
- But where did you deposit the hand-bag?|- Do not ask me, Mr. Worthing.

1558
01:25:04,239 --> 01:25:06,680
Miss Prism, this is a matter of no small|importance to me. I insist on knowing

1559
01:25:06,800 --> 01:25:08,720
where you deposited the hand-bag|that contained that infant.

1560
01:25:08,800 --> 01:25:12,079
I left it in the cloak-room of one of the|larger railway stations in London.

1561
01:25:12,960 --> 01:25:14,840
What railway station?

1562
01:25:15,560 --> 01:25:16,680
Victoria.

1563
01:25:20,520 --> 01:25:21,920
The Brighton line?

1564
01:25:23,159 --> 01:25:24,560
The Brighton line.

1565
01:25:28,159 --> 01:25:29,640
Gwendolen, wait here for me.

1566
01:25:29,800 --> 01:25:33,680
If you are not too long, I will wait|here for you all my life.

1567
01:25:55,279 --> 01:25:57,239
This suspense is terrible.

1568
01:26:00,039 --> 01:26:02,640
- Miss Prism, is this the handbag?|- Let me look.

1569
01:26:04,039 --> 01:26:08,640
Examine it carefully before speaking. The happines|of more than one life depends on your answer.

1570
01:26:09,119 --> 01:26:10,000
Thank you.

1571
01:26:11,479 --> 01:26:12,800
It seems to be mine.

1572
01:26:12,960 --> 01:26:16,039
Yes, here is the injury it received|through the upsetting

1573
01:26:16,159 --> 01:26:19,520
of a Gower Street omnibus in|younger and happier days.

1574
01:26:21,600 --> 01:26:23,159
Here is the stain on the lining

1575
01:26:23,359 --> 01:26:27,319
caused by the explosion of a temperance beverage,|an incident that occurred at Leamington.

1576
01:26:27,960 --> 01:26:29,760
And here, on the lock, are my initials.

1577
01:26:30,880 --> 01:26:33,760
I had forgotten that in an extravagant mood|I had had them placed there.

1578
01:26:33,960 --> 01:26:35,680
The bag is undoubtedly mine.

1579
01:26:35,880 --> 01:26:38,239
I am delighted to have it so|unexpectedly restored to me.

1580
01:26:38,439 --> 01:26:41,319
It has been a great inconvenience|being without it all these years.

1581
01:26:41,479 --> 01:26:42,600
Miss Prism,

1582
01:26:44,000 --> 01:26:46,800
more is restored to you than the hand-bag.

1583
01:26:47,640 --> 01:26:50,479
I am the baby that was placed in it.

1584
01:26:50,720 --> 01:26:51,680
You?

1585
01:26:52,359 --> 01:26:53,319
Yes...

1586
01:26:54,199 --> 01:26:55,079
Mother!

1587
01:26:55,239 --> 01:26:57,439
Mr. Worthing! I am unmarried.

1588
01:26:59,039 --> 01:27:00,079
Unmarried!

1589
01:27:00,960 --> 01:27:03,840
I do not deny that is a serious blow.

1590
01:27:04,199 --> 01:27:07,079
But who has the right to cast a stone|against one who has suffered?

1591
01:27:07,279 --> 01:27:09,600
Cannot repentance wipe out an act of folly?

1592
01:27:09,920 --> 01:27:12,279
Why should there be one law for men,|and another for women?

1593
01:27:12,560 --> 01:27:14,680
Mother, I forgive you.

1594
01:27:14,880 --> 01:27:17,079
Mr. Worthing, there is some error.

1595
01:27:17,600 --> 01:27:20,960
There is the lady who can tell you|who you really are. Oh, dear.

1596
01:27:22,800 --> 01:27:26,399
Lady Bracknell, I hate to seem inquisitive,

1597
01:27:26,600 --> 01:27:29,960
but would you kindly inform me who I really am?

1598
01:27:30,720 --> 01:27:34,479
You are the son of my poor sister,|Mrs. Moncrieff,

1599
01:27:34,960 --> 01:27:37,760
and consequently Algernon's elder brother.

1600
01:27:39,319 --> 01:27:40,960
Algy's elder brother!

1601
01:27:42,359 --> 01:27:45,560
Then I have a brother after all. I knew I had|a brother! I always said I had a brother!

1602
01:27:45,760 --> 01:27:47,960
Cecily, how could you have ever doubted|that I had a brother?

1603
01:27:48,319 --> 01:27:50,199
Dr. Chasuble, my unfortunate brother.

1604
01:27:50,520 --> 01:27:52,000
Miss Prism, my unfortunate brother.

1605
01:27:52,159 --> 01:27:54,199
Gwendolen, my unfortunate brother.

1606
01:27:54,359 --> 01:27:56,960
Algy, you young scoundrel, you will have to|behave with more respect to me in the future.

1607
01:27:57,119 --> 01:27:59,159
You have never behaved to me like|a brother in all your life.

1608
01:27:59,319 --> 01:28:02,760
Well, not till today, old boy, I admit. I tried|my best, however, though I was out of practice.

1609
01:28:03,279 --> 01:28:04,479
My own!

1610
01:28:05,199 --> 01:28:06,600
But what own are you?

1611
01:28:06,880 --> 01:28:09,840
What is your Christian name, now that|you have become some one else?

1612
01:28:10,119 --> 01:28:13,159
Your decision on the subject of my|Christian name is irrevocable, I suppose?

1613
01:28:13,319 --> 01:28:15,680
I never change, except in my affections.

1614
01:28:15,880 --> 01:28:18,079
What a noble nature you have, Gwendolen!

1615
01:28:18,600 --> 01:28:20,880
Then the question must be cleared|up once and for all.

1616
01:28:21,359 --> 01:28:24,479
Aunt Augusta, at the time when Miss Prism|left me in the hand-bag,

1617
01:28:25,600 --> 01:28:26,800
had I been christened already?

1618
01:28:27,520 --> 01:28:31,119
Every luxury that money could buy,|including christening,

1619
01:28:31,439 --> 01:28:34,720
had been lavished on you by your|fond and doting parents.

1620
01:28:34,920 --> 01:28:37,359
Then I was christened! That is settled.

1621
01:28:37,680 --> 01:28:40,560
Now, what was my Christian name?|Let me know the worst.

1622
01:28:41,399 --> 01:28:44,840
Being the eldest son you were naturally|called after your father.

1623
01:28:45,359 --> 01:28:48,039
Yes, but what was my father's|Christian name?

1624
01:28:48,800 --> 01:28:52,079
I cannot at the moment recall what|the General's Christian name was.

1625
01:28:52,319 --> 01:28:53,800
I have no doubt he had one.

1626
01:28:54,159 --> 01:28:57,119
He was eccentric, I admit.|But only in later years.

1627
01:28:57,520 --> 01:28:59,640
Algy! Can't you recollect what our|father's Christian name was?

1628
01:28:59,960 --> 01:29:03,239
My dear boy, we were never even on speaking|terms. He died before I was a year old.

1629
01:29:04,760 --> 01:29:07,560
His name would be in the Army Lists of|the period, I suppose, Aunt Augusta?

1630
01:29:08,279 --> 01:29:11,880
The General was essentially a man of peace,|except in his domestic life.

1631
01:29:12,159 --> 01:29:15,680
But I have no doubt his name would appear|in any military directory.

1632
01:29:21,520 --> 01:29:23,720
The Army Lists of the last forty years are here.

1633
01:29:25,560 --> 01:29:27,920
These delightful records should have been|my constant study.

1634
01:29:29,039 --> 01:29:31,319
M... Generals...

1635
01:29:33,760 --> 01:29:36,439
Magley, Maxbey,

1636
01:29:36,800 --> 01:29:38,680
Maxbohm... What ghastly names.

1637
01:29:39,760 --> 01:29:42,119
Merkly, Migsby, Mobbs.

1638
01:29:43,720 --> 01:29:44,840
Moncrieff!

1639
01:29:45,760 --> 01:29:49,640
Lieutenant 1840, Captain, Lieutenant-Colonel,|Colonel, General 1869,

1640
01:29:49,800 --> 01:29:51,079
Christian name,

1641
01:29:53,760 --> 01:29:55,319
Ernest John.

1642
01:29:58,600 --> 01:30:02,479
Gwendolen, I always told you that my|name was Ernest, didn't I?

1643
01:30:02,640 --> 01:30:05,439
Ernest. My own Ernest!

1644
01:30:05,600 --> 01:30:08,039
Cecily, at last!

1645
01:30:08,720 --> 01:30:10,840
Laetitia, at last!

1646
01:30:11,680 --> 01:30:13,239
Gwendolen, at last!

1647
01:30:13,720 --> 01:30:14,840
My nephew,

1648
01:30:15,319 --> 01:30:18,520
you seem to be displaying signs of triviality.

1649
01:30:18,800 --> 01:30:20,600
On the contrary, Aunt Augusta,

1650
01:30:20,760 --> 01:30:23,279
I've now realised for the first time in my life

1651
01:30:23,520 --> 01:30:26,239
the vital Importance of Being Earnest.

1652
01:30:27,520 --> 01:30:31,520
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